Terry Collins: Genius At Work


Final Score: Mets 7, Nationals 5

The Mets had a 7-5 lead entering the 9th inning last night with Jeurys Familia coming in to try and close it out. Of course Familia loaded the bases. With one out and Bryce Harper coming up, Terry Collins yanked his closer in favor of subpar chunky lefty Josh Edgin.

Terry Collins decided to go with the lefty on lefty matchup even though Bryce Harper crushes every type of pitcher and Jeurys Familia is our ace out of the pen. But somehow Terry’s plan worked. Harper hit the ball right back to Edgin for a 1-2-3 double play.

I’m not even going to question Terry’s insane decision making on this night. The Mets won a game they desperately needed to win, and that’s all that matters.

Travis The Great: Travis d’Arnaud was the MVP last night hitting a two-run homer in the second inning and a three-run shot in the fourth. Somehow with everyone going down due to injury d’Arnaud has found a way to stay on the field. I feel like he has sucked the life force out of the rest of the team in order to preserve his own fragile body.

Need Jacob: Jacob deGrom outpitched Max Scherzer. He gave up 3 runs on 6 hits over 7 innings and struck out 12. Terry put him on the mound for the 7th inning despite having over 100 pitches, and I’m totally in favor of the move. We need our aces to pitch seven innings. The pen just can’t be trusted.

Nats Poo Pen: Speaking of bullpens that can’t be trusted, the Nationals pen imploded in the 8th inning. Jose Reyes doubled, T.J. Rivera reached on an error by Ryan Zimmerman, and Travis d’Arnaud was walked to load the bases. Then the Nats gave up an RBI single up the middle to Kevin Plawecki. I didn’t even realize he was still on the roster. Then they walked Michael Conforto and forced in the seventh run.

Seriously Zimmerman?: What the hell is going on with Ryan Zimmerman? The guy hasn’t done a damn thing since 2013. I thought him and David Wright were heading down the same road to early retirement. Last night Zimmerman hit a solo bomb in the second inning and a two run jack in the 8th inning off Addison Reed. He hit his 9th and 10th home runs of the season in April?!? If the Nationals have Daniel Murphy, Bryce Harper AND Ryan Zimmerman competing for the MVP the NL East “race” is already over.

Today: Zack Wheeler faces Steven Strasburg this afternoon. Tomorrow Noah Syndergaard is supposedly pitching. He said yesterday the Mets asked him to get an MRI, and he refused. Lol. On the one hand, it’s smart to do the opposite of whatever the Mets training staff tells you to do. So I respect his choice from that perspective. On the other hand, his bicep was aching, and he said he couldn’t lift his arm this week. I’m sure it will all work out of great.

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Terry’s Dog-Tired 

“I’m tired, boss. Dog tired. Tired of all the heartbreaking losses. Tired of all the media second guessing. Tired of the Wilpons “forgetting” to pay my salary. But mostly, I’m just tired of all the player injuries, day after day.” – Terry Collins to Sandy Alderson (probably)
I’ve been baffled by many of Terry’s managerial decisions over the years and confused by some of his postgame statements. But there was nothing confusing or shocking about the quotes from Terry that came out today. Today it was reported that Terry is tired and considering retirement after next season. Quite frankly, I feel the exact same way. This 2016 team sucked the life out of me. If I feel this way after next season I’m ready to move down to Florida and be Terry’s neighbor. We’ll just bask in the sun, and he can show me how he achieves his glorious tan. I’ll watch spring training baseball, and then when the teams head north I’ll go to the beach everyday and listen to the games on the radio. Combining the beach with the Mets might at least help keep my regular season blood pressure down.

So if Terry leaves who’s up next? Terry said he’s been struggling with all the travel. Considering Dan Warthen struggles to travel from the bench to the pitcher’s mound for the occasional conference, I can’t imagine he steps into the manager’s role.

Wally Backman just left the organization. Perfect timing Wally! The guy was waiting for an opportunity for eight years, decided it wasn’t going to happen, stormed off, and a month later Terry announces he’s running out of gas. Whoops!

Tim Teufel is out. He couldn’t even coach third base this year. Maybe David Wright? Bring back the player/manager? Do they have a DL for managers because I’m not even sure David can sit on the bench without tweaking that back of his. He’d probably have to lie down flat on the bench and watch the action from an iPad or something.

What about Bartolo Colon?!? I’d absolutely be in favor of appointing His Sexiness to the managerial throne as long as his translator is willing to work the extra hours.

Who’s left? Bench coach Dick Scott? I’m not even sure I know what he looks like. Did SNY show him on camera once this year? Apparently he’s number 23. The Mets’ media guide probably just has a photo of Mr. Met on Dick Scott’s page, and they just assigned him Michael Jordan’s number.

I can’t wait until Jeff Wilpon takes over the managerial reins in 2018 and has Noah Syndergaard throw 350 innings.

Rest up Terry. We all need this long winter vacation.

Old Man Collins Fell Asleep


Final Score: Braves 5, Mets 4

There are many factors that will ultimately determine whether or not the Mets win the Wild Card. One major factor will be Terry Collins’ handling of the bullpen. As we all know, bullpen management isn’t exactly one of his strengths. Hell he pretty much sucks at most aspects of in-game management. Well last night Terry fell asleep at the wheel again. He botched the hook of his starting pitcher, he screwed up the management of his bullpen, and he missed key spots to pinch hit. Those blunders combined with some on field mistakes cost the Mets a close game. Also Yo is ice cold right now and consequently the Mets offense has shut down. There’s a shocker!

Terry Fell Asleep: Robert Gsellman did a nice job getting through 5 scoreless innings. By the 6th inning the Mets were only up 1-0, and Terry should have had a short leash with his young starter. There’s no reason whatsoever to take chances with these young guys, especially considering Terry has the 40-man roster at his disposal. Other than Julio Teheran, the top of the order was due up in the 6th. Terry should have had his bullpen cranking and ready to go. He did not. He was asleep. By the time Gsellman had surrendered two straight singles to Ender Inciarte and Adonis Garcia, Terry realized he blew it. Warthen visited the mound to give the pen some warmup time but the lefty wasn’t ready to face Freddie Freeman. Gsellman ended up walking Freeman to load the bases.

Mold Glovers: Then Gsellman gave up a gift single to Matt Kemp that fell between our horrible outfielders Curtis Granderson in center and Jay Bruce in right field.

Squeezed: Josh Smoker then came in and was squeezed by the home plate umpire. He walked Nick Markakis to force in a run and make it 2-1 Braves. Fernando Salas then entered and managed to escape further damage.

Nap Time: In the 7th inning, Fernando Salas was pulled after giving up a single and then retiring the pitcher. Terry brought in Jerry Blevins to face Inciarte, and he gave up a single. Then he left Blevins in to face the righty Met Killer Adonis Garcia. I saw the home run coming. He’s hit like .300 against the Mets this year with multiple soul crushing homers. I saw it coming a mile away. The three run shot made it 5-1. Goddamn the Braves.

The Runs and Final Mistakes: In the 8th inning, Asdrubal Cabrera walked and Yoenis Cespedes was hit by a pitch. Then Grandy doubled to make it 5-2 and T.J. Rivera added a sac fly to make it 5-3. Then the Braves brought in the lefty for Jay Bruce and the Mets pinch hit for him. Bruce’s early onset METS disease has become so bad that he’s being pinch hit for!!! Pray for Bruce! He’s dunzo. Anyway Terry pinch hit Eric Campbell, and I don’t care that he hit an RBI single to make it 5-4. It’s still the wrong move. The lefties on the bench are better major league hitters. Period.

D’Arnaud is Garbage: In the second inning with two men on and one out Travis d’Arnaud failed to deliver a hit. In the 8th inning, he came up with runners on the corners and two outs. Terry should have pinch hit for him. He’s terrible. He grounded out and failed to tie the game. He has one of the worst cases of METS disease I’ve ever seen. He’s lost all his skills in one offseason. He has to be hiding an injury. Book it.

METS Disease: Ray Ramirez will need to study the bodies of Bruce and d’Arnaud in the offseason to see what he can learn about METS disease prevention. Speaking of our legendary training staff, the Mets fired former assistant trainer Mike Herbst from the organization. Herbst was best known for his use of bloodletting to cure the plague of sweat sickness that swept through the Mets clubhouse in the early 2000s. His medieval methods will not be missed.

Yo Ain’t Hitting So We Out: Yo came up with a man on and two outs in the 9th inning and struck out on a breaking ball. He missed the pitch before his strikeout so badly that he fell over while swinging. He’s cold right now. And as a result the offense is bad again. It ain’t rocket science. Without Yo we’ve got nada. The Mets failed to hit with runners in scoring position throughout the game.

Braves Have Nothing To Lose: In the third inning, Asdrubal Cabrera doubled and the Braves threw over to second base so many times. They forced Cabrera and his bum knee to dive back and forth. He looked like he badly aggravated his knee multiple times. Then in the 8th inning they nailed Yoenis Cespedes on the arm with a pitch. Screw the Braves. They’ve got nothing to lose, and they are successfully punishing and embarrassing the Mets.

Today: The Wild Card race is a three way tie. Let’s salvage a game against the Braves at home. You gotta love how once again we can’t take advantage of our “easy schedule”.

Over Before He Started

Final Score: Nationals 8, Mets 1

This game against the Nationals was over the second Terry Collins decided to start Rafael Montero. The Mets never had a chance with Monty the BP pitching machine on the mound. I said after his last start he should be replaced in the rotation. Hell everyone other than Terry felt that way. Instead Terry went with him, and he had nothing. Keith Hernandez was even baffled by the decision. As he warmed up before the first pitch Keith talked about his horrendous numbers and all the walks he surrendered in his previous starts. Keith implied it could be a long night. Well it wasn’t a long night for Montero.

Get Him Out: Once Montero was handed the ball to start, Terry had many opportunities to salvage the game. Monty loaded the bases in the first inning on a Trea Turner single, Jayson Werth walk, and Daniel Murphy single. If I’m the manager, I’m already warming up my long man and pulling Montero from the game. I wouldn’t have even let him face Bryce Harper. Instead Terry left him in, and he walked in two runs. Somehow Rafael Montero managed to escape the first inning without surrendering the big game killing hit, and I thought to myself, “Thank God. At least his day is done.” Nope.

Get Him Out 2.0: In the second inning the Mets had two men on and two outs with Rafael Montero’s spot due up. Instead of pinch hitting, Terry kept Monty in the game. Mind blowing decision. He obviously struck out and then pitched like crap the following half inning.

Get Him Out (Last Chance): Montero surrendered a leadoff homer to pitcher Mat Latos in the bottom of the second inning to make it 3-1. Then he retired the next two batters before giving up a double to Murph and walking Bryce Harper intentionally. I thought at this point he was done. I thought Terry was finally ready to pull this bum from the game. Instead of taking him out, he left him in to surrender a three-run blast to Anthony Rendon. Unreal. The Nats added a couple of extra runs later in the game and the Mets never got anything going against the awful Mat Latos (before he was pulled with an injury). But this game was over because Montero took the mound.

Flushy Flushy: It’s not even fair to pretend that Gabriel Ynoa, Logan Verrett, or Sean Gilmartin give the Mets a great chance to win a ball game. They don’t. But they give the Mets SOME chance to win. And Montero gave them no chance whatsoever. It’s hard to believe Terry continues to flush meaningful games down the toilet. It’s not like we’re in a goddamn race for a playoff spot or anything!

Please Remember: Don’t forget Terry’s blunders. The team was on the path to destruction in August. Then Yoenis Cespedes came back and some other hitters became hot. And as a result of that Terry will receive credit for “not losing the team” and people will say “his guys play for him”. And you know what? He deserves some credit. If he gets the blame when the players fail to perform, then he gets credit when they turn things around. But don’t forget all the in-game blunders Terry has had this season. We’re probably going to wind up winning 84-89 games. Whether we win the Wild Card or not this season will be about the games we failed to win that Terry and Co. ultimately flushed down the toilet. Those games are the difference between a division title and a chance at the BS Wild Card sham playoff game.

Stiff Neck: Speaking of Terry’s blunders, Wilmer Flores still has an injured neck because Terry forgot to pinch run for him this weekend. Nice job TC!

Second Class Citizens: The Mets remain in the second Wild Card spot because the Cardinals lost to the Cubs. God the Mets and Cards are such second class citizens in the NL. The Cubs and Nationals are just a better class of club. Period.

Jeff Wilpon’s Boy: The Mets lost Triple-A manager Wally Backman yesterday. At first they said he was fired but later he clarified that he actually resigned. Who the hell knows? All I know is that I’ve read for years now that he’s a terrible manager who doesn’t listen to the organization and burned out a number of young arms at Triple-A including last night’s useless arm Rafael Montero. Remember when Monty was a top prospect? Rumor has it Wally killed him. There’s supposedly a long list of arms that he’s messed up. Apparently he’s stuck around with the organization because Jeff Wilpon loves him. I know many fans wanted to see him manage because he had the ’86 fire. Oh well. And now his watch has ended.

Today: Noah Syndergaard to the rescue today. Save us Thor!

It’s Time To Add Terry To The Hall Of Managerial Faces

terry hall of faces

Final Score: Giants 8, Mets 1

Here is the bottom line. The Mets players deserve blame for this train wreck of a season. Sandy Alderson deserves blame for this train wreck of a season. Terry Collins is a crappy in-game manager and deserves blame for this train wreck of a season. When your team enters a season surrounded by high expectations and the squad underachieves all year, the manager gets the blame first. That’s all there is to it. It’s simple. This team hasn’t shown any signs of life in months, and Terry should be canned. It’s time. Everyone keeps saying he’ll make it to the end of the season. Why? Why should he? Are we giving him an extra month because he went to the World Series last year? Are we worried he’ll sue the Wilpons over some ageism lawsuit? I honestly don’t get it. Dump this guy and let’s move on. The Mets are 5.5 out in the Wild Card standing. They are 2 games under .500. The season has long been over, and quite frankly it’s embarrassing that Terry and his staff are still here.

Lugo Proved Me Wrong: I was obviously pessimistic about the Mets chances before the game with Seth Lugo facing Johnny Cueto. But Seth proved me wrong. He went 6.2 innings and gave up 3 runs on 7 hits. He was extremely efficient. Definitely a bright spot in another horrendous game. Terry yanked him in the 7th with two outs after an Eduardo Nunez double and a Joe Panik intentional walk. Jerry Blevins promptly gave up back to back RBI singles to make it 3-1 Giants and the game was over.

Blunder: Seth Lugo and Jose Reyes were on first and second in the fifth inning with two outs. Kelly Johnson came up and hit a single directly at the right fielder. For some reason, Seth Lugo strolled right through Tim Teufel’s stop sign and headed home. This led to an embarrassing run down, and he was eventually tagged out at home. At the time the game was tied at 1. So this blunder definitely eliminated a big opportunity for the Mets with Jay Bruce coming up. Oh well.

How Many Hits?: The Mets had their lineup essentially back at full strength (minus Neil Walker) with the return of Yoenis Cespedes. But it seems people conveniently forgot all those months where we had Yo in the lineup and this team still underachieved. It’s nice to have him back, but it won’t matter. 11 hits last night and one run to show for it. Nothing but a Curtis Granderson solo shot on the Mets scoreboard. Plenty of opportunities.

Blunder 2.0: In the 8th inning the Giants piled runs on thanks to a bunch of hits off of Josh Smoker, Jeurys Familia and a big homer off of Erik Goeddel. Asdrubal Cabrera also made a horrendous throwing error. It went from 3-1 to 8-1 in a finger snap.

Let’s Talk About Bruce: The real reason the Mets didn’t score last night is because Jay Bruce and Yo basically didn’t do anything. They combined to go 1 for 8. I’m sure that will change in the coming weeks, and all of a sudden nobody else will hit. But regarding Bruce, I’m actually kind of embarrassed as a fan. I realize he’s undoubtedly going to catch METS disease and become terrible, and we’re all feeling pessimistic etc. But I’m already seeing fans and beat writers comparing him to Jason Bay. Are you kidding me? The guy came here 3 weeks ago. It’s almost disrespectful to Jason Bay to compare Bruce’s brief Mets career to Bay’s Mets career. Jason Bay is basically the number one example of a METS disease victim that we have on record. He epitomizes everything that METS disease is. He inexplicably lost all of his skills at 30 years old the second he put on a Mets uniform, and then went on to have three awful seasons. He just became worse and worse. And fans have the balls to already compare Jay Bruce to Bay after three weeks? Bruce has to earn his METS disease crown. This could just be a rough stretch. How dare y’all compare him to a METS disease legend. Let’s give him at least another month before we start crowning him.

Today: The Mets aren’t in the Wild Card race anymore. 5.5 games isn’t actually close. The Giants are burying us, and then St. Louis will finish us. Bartolo Colon pitches today. I wonder if he’ll be here next season. He’s the only arm in our rotation that I trust to give us 200 innings.

The Mets Make Me Sad


Final Score: D-Backs 9, Mets 0

The Mets are now a .500 ball club for the first time since April. They were swept at home by the cellar dwelling Arizona Diamondbacks. They never had a chance to score a run in this game. They are playing like a dead team full of guys hoping the season ends tomorrow. But there’s another month and a half of games left. I have tickets for a game at the end of this month, and I don’t even want to go. So many young campers were at the game today. Poor campers. Nobody should have to suffer like the fans did today.

Noah Syndergaard barely pitched 5 innings, and he gave up 3 runs on 8 hits. He hasn’t been the same since they discovered the bone chips in his elbow. Poor Noah. Jon Niese came on in relief of Thor and was crushed. He gave up 6 runs in one inning of relief. He’s terrible and always has been.

The Most Public Of Our Many Humiliations: This D-Backs series may be the most embarrassing public execution of a Mets season in years. Terry ranted for four minutes after the game about how the players need to be passionate. Terry said if the current crew of players don’t start playing inspired ball, he’ll find guys in Vegas who will. Unfortunately for Terry, there’s nobody left to call up in Vegas. They’re already in the Mets starting lineup. Maybe the Mets will fire Terry Collins and name Eric Campbell manager on an interim basis.

Let’s Be The Actual Worst: If the Mets are going to keep crashing and burning in 2016, then I want the team to post the lowest batting average with runners in scoring position in baseball history. Right now we’re number two, but “worst of all-time” just rolls off the tongue better.

We Are The Actual Worst: The D-Backs ran all over the Mets pitching staff again. They stole four bases against us. The Mets are the worst team in the majors at preventing stolen bases. This has been a problem for the Mets all season, and they haven’t been able to fix it. It doesn’t even feel like they’ve tried to fix it.

The Worst Part of It All: The worst part about this Mets dumpster fire is it’s going to make it harder to sell Yo on a return when competitive teams start showing interest. Yoenis Cespedes is probably packing his golf bag and his horse into his rocket car right now. He’s ready to get the hell out of dodge.

Fear The Real Rock Bottom: I’m scared to watch the rest of the games. The Yo DL trip was devastating. This D-Backs series was brutal. But those aren’t really rock bottom. I’m a Mets fan. I know what rock bottom is like, and I know what “Mets rock bottom” is like. We haven’t seen that yet. That usually involves something like a franchise player being diagnosed with a debilitating spinal condition like poor David Wright. Bless his poor neck and spine.

If I was directing “2016 Mets” the movie I’d just copy the ending of “2015 Nationals”. That’s when you trade for Papelbon, watch him choke Cespedes in the dugout on national television and then cut to black.

Tomorrow: The Padres come to town tomorrow. Styx plays a concert on Saturday. Looks like we’ll see a meaningful concert in August instead of meaningful games in September.

Mets Fans Sentenced To Watch Remaining Games



Final Score (in 12 innings): D-Backs 3, Mets 2

Watching the 2016 Mets combined with long drawn out discussions on SNY about how to improve MLB pace of play is about as boring as TV gets. And that’s what last night’s game was. The Mets had 6 hits in 12 painful innings and Gary, Keith, and Ron just kept spitballing about how the commissioner can speed up baseball. You want to improve the league? Just get rid of a few teams and include the Mets on the list of teams to cut. Board up Citi Field. Jon Taffer would walk into Citi Field, watch one baseball game, and then shut the whole damn thing down.

Thank A Lot Kelly: The pain and suffering almost concluded in the 9th inning with a 2-0 Mets loss. At that point, the Mets had only mustered 3 hits. But Kelly Johnson just had to hit a massive pinch hit two-run bomb to send the game to extra innings. Johnson forced us to watch the Mets bat three more times and ultimately see Jerry Blevins give up the game winning homer to a guy who’s never hit one in his career. Kelly Johnson actually said after the game he thought his clutch shot would spark the team. There’s no sparking this lifeless corpse of a club.

Always Sexy: Bartolo Colon was obviously sexy as hell in this game because he’s great and also because the D-Backs stink. He went 7 innings, gave up 1 run on 7 hits and he struck out 8.

Terry’s Final Days: It’s hard to even find the energy to nitpick in this game. In the top of the 8th inning with a D-Back runner on third and one out, Terry elected to pitch to Paul Goldschmidt instead of walking him to set up a double play. Goldy hit a sac fly to make it 2-0 D-Backs. Terry burned Jon Niese in the 9th and failed to double switch him into the game. Without his long man, he ended up going to Jeurys Familia for two innings as if it was the NLCS. In the 10th inning, T.J. Rivera led off with a single and Terry asked Travis d’Arnaud to bunt him over to second base. Always a bad move giving up outs, but who are we kidding d’Arnaud probably would have hit into a double play anyway. Travis d’Arnaud obviously popped up and blew his chance to move the runner over. He has METS disease so bad. Poor Travis.

Joke Lineup: Terry made questionable calls throughout the game, and he set a joke of a lineup full of our Triple-A squad. Ty Kelly, Matt Reynolds, and T.J. Rivera all started. We might as well just call up Soup and cancel the season. It’s hard to believe that 9 months after playing in the World Series the Mets started arguably their worst lineup of 2016 as the calls to fire Terry Collins grow louder and louder.

D’Arnaud’s Horrifying METS Disease: Travis d’Arnaud transforming into an utterly useless ballplayer has been a real curveball that I did not expect in 2016. He’s got METS disease like you read about. The D-Backs stole 4 bases on him tonight. They ran all over him last night. I think the final number was 9 stolen bases against him in two games. He stinks behind the plate, and he stinks at the plate.

The Grandyman Can’t Do Anything: Meanwhile Curtis Granderson may wind up posting the lowest RBI to HR ratio of all time for a player with a minimum of 20 HR. In 2001 Barry Bonds hit 73 HR and 137 RBI for a ratio of 1.876. Not sure if that’s the lowest ever but Grandy has 18 and 31 which is 1.72. Grandy went 0 for 5 in this game and continued to kill the Mets at the top of the order. Michael Conforto has been a huge sophomore disappointment. Just brutal. Terry says we need to get Michael going, but he didn’t even start him.

Excuses, Excuses, Excuses: The SNY booth made excuses all game about the Mets injuries and blah blah blah. This team has enough major league players on the roster to compete. They have failed to muster any offense all season. They failed with Yoenis Cespedes in the lineup, with Jose Reyes in the lineup, and with Asdrubal Cabrera in the lineup. Nothing has been able to spark this offense. I think the injury excuses are kind of lame at this point.

Today: This could be Terry Collins’ last game as Mets manager. A sweep at home to the D-Backs is a fireable offense. My sources tell me Terry has already purchased tickets for Saturday’s game against the Padres at Citi Field and is looking forward to watching the Styx concert as a private citizen. On the bright side they’ll probably hire bench coach Dick Scott on an interim basis. So at least we can call our manager Dick all the time.

Terry Collins Digging His Own Grave



Final Score: Tigers 6, Mets 5

Even when the 2016 Mets play a close game and score some runs they find a way to lose.

Slower Than Duda: Let’s start with the lead story. It was 6-5 Tigers heading into the 9th inning. With two outs, Jay Bruce and Alejandro De Aza hit back to back singles. Then Travis d’Arnaud singled to right field and slow ass Jay Bruce was gunned down at the plate by J.D. Martinez.

He’s Ready To Die: Terry Collins never challenged the play at the plate. Sure Bruce looked out, and he’s incredibly slow. But Collins after the game basically became hostile about the non-challenge. I said this weeks ago, but Collins is ready to die (i.e. ready to be fired). He’s an idiot for not challenging. Challenging is the manager’s way to go down with a fight. By not challenging, Terry essentially waved the white flag. And if our manager is waving the white flag then he might as well wave it on the entire damn season. Terry either doesn’t understand the rules or doesn’t care to play by them anymore.

He’s Ready To Die Part 2: Terry dug his own grave with the horrendous lineup he fielded at the start of the game. Ty Kelly in left field and Rene Rivera at DH? We’re really voluntarily playing horrendous hitters and justifying it because of lefty/right splits? I don’t care that Ty Kelly had two hits in the game. I also don’t care who is pitching for the opposition. You cannot play your light hitting backup catcher at DH. TC is losing his marbles folks.

Verrett/Niese Flip-A-Dip: Logan Verrett is terrible and gave up 6 runs over 3.2 innings. He walked 2 and gave up 7 hits. I said yesterday you would see a bad Verrett start and Niese in relief because it was the lock of the century. Verrett stinks and Jon Niese or some minor leaguer will probably be the new 5th starter after that horrendous performance.

The 2016 Scapegoat Narrative: Before the season, I predicted the Mets would win the 2016 World Series. So I obviously have no idea what I’m talking about. But I completely nailed the 2016 Mets pre-season Scapegoat predictions. I nailed Yoenis Cespedes and #GolfGate #HustleGate #SmokingGate. I nailed Neil Walker taking some blame because he never truly replaced Murph in the eyes of the fans. I failed to predict the Daniel Murphy MVP season, but I’m pretty sure nobody on the planet predicted this Murph season. I nailed TC getting tons of blame once the season went south. I even had Matt Harvey on my list. I didn’t predict his injury, but rest assured his absence will be cited as one of the reasons for the Mets 2016 failure. The only thing I missed was the Mets being the worst hitting team with runners in scoring position in the history of baseball. Whoops!

Today: Let’s see if Jacob deGrom can help us get one freaking win.

Trade Deadline Is Over; Back To The Losing

Final Score (in 10 innings): Yankees 6, Mets 5

It was reported yesterday that Terry Collins was seen cursing in the Mets clubhouse around 4:30 and storming in and out of the Mets training room. A lot of people wondered if there was a new injury or something like that. Nope. I know what happened. Terry got the call from Sandy. Alderson said, “Hey Terry. We traded for Jay Bruce. Don’t blow this. If things don’t work out this season you’re fired.” Then he hung up.

Well Terry did not disappoint last night. He completely blew it. This Subway Series opener had all the elements of a classic Mets vs. Yankees matchup. It had the Mets coming through with a big hit to tease us, the Mets manager making horrendous decisions, game changing bloop BS hits for the Yankees, and the Mets ultimately beating themselves. Classic!

It even had all of our favorite things about the 2016 season. The Mets left men on base and failed in big spots with runners in scoring position, Terry mismanaged the bullpen, and the Mets failed to comeback late in the game despite having opportunities. We’re the best! The Wild Card Mets and the rebuilding Yankees basically have the same record. But don’t worry we’re still Kings of The City! I think? Nah not really.

Inside The Park Nope: The game started with Brett Gardner crushing a ball to center field over the head of brand new scrap heap center fielder Justin Ruggiano. Gardy decided to go for the inside the park home run, and the Mets successfully executed the relay throw to home and nailed him at the plate. I saw a lot of people complaining about the Yankees sending Gardner. Umm first of all Gardy is playing like a guy who just watched his front office waive the white flag on the season and doesn’t give a damn about send or hold signals. Second of all, when has it ever been a bad idea to force the Mets to make a play? I can’t believe the Mets executed. 9 times out of 10 we throw that ball to the backstop or way off line. Good send in my mind.

Wilmer The King In July: In the second inning, Wilmer Flores hit a solo blast against CC Sabathia. Wilmer was the King In July with his .290 average and 7 homers. Hopefully it’s carrying over into August now.

METS Disease: In the third inning, Justin Ruggiano grounded into a double play and instantly strained his hamstring. He’s going on the DL. The Mets signed him off the scrap heap this weekend, and he instantly contracted METS disease. All he had to do was sign the contract. Very dangerous stuff. Best to stay away from the Mets. I can’t wait to see Jay Bruce step to the plate for the first time tonight and foul the first pitch off of his foot. Shatter every single bone. Yo won’t be starting tomorrow because he’s still hurt. But Terry said he can pinch hit. So maybe Bruce will come up late in the game and foul a ball off of Yoenis Cespedes in the on-deck circle. It’s a disease folks. Pray for them all.

Terry’s Choice: Logan Verrett pitched 5 innings and gave up 3 runs on 4 hits. He isn’t very good. In the top of the fourth inning, Jacoby Ellsbury doubled and then Verrett walked Mark Teixeira who hasn’t done a damn thing all season. Then Ellsbury advanced on a fly out, and Verrett threw a wild pitch to let him score. The Yanks tied the game at 1 thanks to Verrett’s wild hospitality. In the 5th inning, Verrett walked Rob Refsnyder with one out. Smart. Then CC bunted him over and Gardner drove him in with a double to make it 2-1. Ellsbury followed that with an RBI single to make it 3-1.

Verrett stinks. Yesterday the Mets re-acquired Jon Niese. He stinks too. I can’t wait for Terry’s choice. Every Verrett start the rest of the way we’re going to hear “start Niese instead” and then when Niese starts we’ll hear “start Verrett”. These two guys are worse than Matt Harvey pitching with thoracic outlet syndrome.

Rally and Reynolds: In the fifth inning, the Mets teased us and actually showed some life. Brandon Nimmo ripped a one out single and with two outs Michael Conforto crushed a double that scored Nimmo from first. That made it 3-2 Yanks. Then in the 6th inning Wilmer Flores singled, Travis d’Arnaud singled, and with one out Matt Reynolds hit a three-run homer to make it 5-3 Mets. An unlikely Subway Series hero? That’s what it felt like. Until he wasn’t.

They’re All Dead: CC was pulled in the 6th inning after he walked pinch hitter Steven Matz. Let me repeat that. The Mets are pinch hitting Steven Matz in the Subway Series during a pennant race because they are still electing to play short-handed rather than actually placing guys on the DL. Anyway Matz walked, Curtis Granderson singled, Michael Conforto walked, and Neil Walker left them loaded. That’s one of our 2016 signature moves.

Terry’s Blunders 1.0: Honestly, I felt confident with the score 5-3 in the 7th inning. Hansel Robles made quick work of the Yanks in the 7th, and Addison Reed/Jeurys Familia have been lights out all season. Instead of just going to Reed in the 8th, Terry decided to screw around with matchups because he’s a moron. Jerry Blevins walked leadoff man Brett Gardner. He retired Ellsbury, but then Reed came in with a man on and the Yanks beat him. They beat our light out setup man because of course they did. He struck out Tex to make it two outs and man on first. But then Brian McCann singled and Didi Gregorius hit a soft little BS Yankee single to left that scored Gardner, and that tied the game at 5. Walking the leadoff man killed us again. Shocker.

Grandy Temporarily Saves The Day: Curtis Granderson made a fantastic catch in the 9th to help prevent Familia from blowing the game thus ensuring we’d lose in extras.

Terry’s Blunders 2.0: Because of Terry’s horrendous bullpen management and playing short, all we had left in the pen for extras was Seth Lugo. He instantly gave up a run in the 10th. I’m happy it was quick. It helped ease the pain.

Terry’s Blunders 3.0: In the bottom of the 10th, James Loney hit a leadoff double. Terry had Matt Reynolds bunt and sacrifice Loney to third base because he’s a fool. Let’s just give up outs with Alejandro De Aza and Rene Rivera on deck. I get that Betances is incredible and you want to set up the sac fly and you don’t expect to get hits off of him blah blah. It’s dumb to give up outs. Period. Anyway, De Aza was hit by a pitch but Rene hit one right back to Dellin Betances for the second out and Grandy struck out. Game Over.

Why Are The Gods So Cruel: Under normal circumstances, I would say that my behavior this season is the definition of insanity. I’ve been watching the Mets over and over and expecting different results. Yankees fans will quickly learn by watching four games against this Mets team that we are mediocre and one of the most overrated .500 teams in the game. I think mediocre is starting to be a generous way of describing our play. Yet I keep expecting things to turn around. Why? Because last year the baseball gods proved that it’s possible.

In 2015 the Mets were somewhere between terrible and mediocre for April, May, June, and July and then they because exceptional. Now I’m not saying one season should be arbitrarily compared to the next, or that it’s reasonable to expect that to happen this season. The set of circumstances in 2015 were different. But it still happened. Why? Why are the gods so cruel that they would show us something like that is possible? Is it because I switched jobs in the middle of the 2015 season? I don’t know if I can just switch jobs again to bring back the magic. Is it because of “That’s baseball Suzyn” or whatever expression that Yankee mook says? I don’t know. But it’s not fair.

Today: Jacob deGrom vs. Masahiro Tanaka, and it’s Jay Bruce debut night. That’s nice. Things will be different tonight. You’ll see! (Cut to me gently rocking back and forth in a rocking chair with a straight jacket on at an insane asylum. Fade to black).

Weekly Roundup: Fun Time Is Over

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Fun Time Is Over: Well all it took was a week dominated by the Yoenis Cespedes sports car collection, horse riding, and a Grand Champion Hog purchase for Terry to finally put his foot down. This week, Old Man Collins channeled his inner Red Forman and declared “fun time is over”. I completely agree that it’s time to focus on baseball. And nobody is actually mad at all the hilarious spring news that has dominated the headlines to date. But Terry is such an old man. Just so irritable. Ranting and raving. “Riding horses to camp! When I was stationed in Siberia, my unit survived off horse meat for a month,” and “Curtis has pink eye? In Korea we never got days off for pink eye. We got shot in the eye.” Classic old man routine. I love it.

Game Notes: The Mets actually kicked off their Grapefruit League schedule this week which should help to minimize the absurd headlines coming out of camp on a going forward basis.

On Thursday, the Mets lost to the Nationals 9-4 in the Daniel Murphy reunion game.  The only takeaway in that game was Rafael Montero pitched like shit. He was such a promising prospect who missed almost all of last season with mystery arm soreness. I really hope his arm recovers, and he can help out the big league team this season. So far he’s not off to a good start. Also, the day after the Mets faced everyone’s favorite homophobe Daniel Murphy, MLB’s Ambassador For Inclusion Billy Bean was invited to Mets camp to conduct his annual sensitivity training. Talk about perfect timing. Billy Bean said he had “communicated all throughout the year in a very supportive way” with Murphy. I wish Murphy’s phone and home were bugged so we could get our hands on those phone calls with Bean as well as Murph’s post call conversations with his wife. Yikes. I’m guessing he may have sugarcoated some conversation points with old Billy.

On Friday, the Marlins and Mets played to a 4-4 tie in a classic spring barn burner. Mets second base prospect and heir apparent Dilson Herrera had an inside the park home run. On Saturday, the Mets beat the Astros 3-1. First base prospect Dominic Smith had two nice hits including one long single that he chose to admire in the batters box. After the game, Terry threw out his metaphorical lunch Bobby Parnell style. On Sunday, the Mets beat the Braves 7-5. Sean Gilmartin had a strong start and Jim Henderson pitched a nice scoreless inning out of the pen. Henderson’s velocity looked good, and he’s a possible veteran candidate to make the pen out of spring. Alejandro De Aza also had a multi-hit game. That’s something we never said about Kirk Nieuwenhuis outside of his legendary 3 dinger performance.

Granderson’s Pink Eye and Wright’s Spine Update: On Monday February 29th, Curtis Granderson was declared “day to day” with pink eye. It is now Monday March 7th and Curtis hasn’t played in a game and is officially wearing glasses. Now I’m no doctor, but normally when a grade school child gets pink eye on a Monday, the kid is healthy and in school for an exam on Friday. Curtis sounds like he’s a few days away from a seeing eye dog and another week away from calling the Eye Bank of New York for a transplant. David Wright also hasn’t played in a game this spring. Still resting his spine for Opening Day #RestfortheCure

Plawecki to AAA Vegas?: Add a new story to the pile of fake news that Mets media has released this spring. First they made up rumors that the Mets will trade Alejandro De Aza in favor of…well in favor of nobody. Then the talk that Ruben Tejada could be released by the end of spring and Eric Campbell could make the team. And now there are talks that Kevin Plawecki may be sent to Vegas to start the season and lose the backup catcher job to…Johnny Monell? Maybe 2016 will be the year of spring catching scrub Raywilly Gomez? I love when these fake rumors are started about how the Mets might consider keeping a bad player over a good player to give the good one minor league reps, but then they ultimately keep the good one because the bad one is not a real viable alternative. Such a joke.

Utley Suspension Dropped: I wrote about the Chase Utley suspension being dropped yesterday. It’s a complete joke. Utley U Butt-ley.

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Mejia Conspiracy Theory: MLB’s new King of Banished Island Jenrry Mejia came out this week and said he was the victim of a conspiracy by MLB to banish him from the game. That’s right. Mejia hired a legal team, and they came up with the old “it’s a goddamn conspiracy” defense. Also, the New York Times published this picture below which says it was taken at his lawyer’s office. Mejia is seemingly being represented by the law firm of Dolce and Gabbana.