Mets Face Off Against Dan “The Ambassador of Inclusion” Murphy

Today, the Mets travel to Viera, Florida to take on Daniel Murphy and the Nationals in their Spring Opener. Murphy seemed excited about kicking off the Grapefruit League schedule against the Mets saying, “It should be fun tomorrow to really fire up baseball again.” When asked about his feelings on the New York media Murph said, “It’s not the first time I’ve spoken to the New York media. They treated me fairly. It would be good to see them again.”

However, the conversation turned serious when our favorite Christian fundamentalist Murphy was asked for his thoughts on Yoenis Cespedes and his recent purchase of a Grand Champion Pig at the St. Lucie County Fair. Murph denounced the actions of Cespedes saying, “The Bible is clear on this as Leviticus states: And the pig, though it has a split hoof completely divided, does not chew the cud; it is unclean for you. You must not eat their meat or touch their carcasses; they are unclean for you.”

He also seemed concerned regarding the effect of Cespedes on his former teammate Noah Syndergaard. Although he struggled to name the specific biblical passage, he took some time to denounce Thor’s horse riding behavior stating, “I believe it is written man shall not ride with a horse; it is an abomination. Something like that.”

Pitching Matchup:

For the Mets, Rafael Montero will get the start. Montero was a top prospect before missing almost all of last season with a mysterious arm injury that was never really explained by the team at any point in time. Discomfort. He battled discomfort. I really hope the discomfort is gone.

And for the Nationals, we will see staff ace Max Scherzer. Beware the Eye of Scherzer.

One thought on “Mets Face Off Against Dan “The Ambassador of Inclusion” Murphy

  1. Pingback: Weekly Roundup: Fun Time Is Over – The Metssiah

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