Old Man Collins Fell Asleep


Final Score: Braves 5, Mets 4

There are many factors that will ultimately determine whether or not the Mets win the Wild Card. One major factor will be Terry Collins’ handling of the bullpen. As we all know, bullpen management isn’t exactly one of his strengths. Hell he pretty much sucks at most aspects of in-game management. Well last night Terry fell asleep at the wheel again. He botched the hook of his starting pitcher, he screwed up the management of his bullpen, and he missed key spots to pinch hit. Those blunders combined with some on field mistakes cost the Mets a close game. Also Yo is ice cold right now and consequently the Mets offense has shut down. There’s a shocker!

Terry Fell Asleep: Robert Gsellman did a nice job getting through 5 scoreless innings. By the 6th inning the Mets were only up 1-0, and Terry should have had a short leash with his young starter. There’s no reason whatsoever to take chances with these young guys, especially considering Terry has the 40-man roster at his disposal. Other than Julio Teheran, the top of the order was due up in the 6th. Terry should have had his bullpen cranking and ready to go. He did not. He was asleep. By the time Gsellman had surrendered two straight singles to Ender Inciarte and Adonis Garcia, Terry realized he blew it. Warthen visited the mound to give the pen some warmup time but the lefty wasn’t ready to face Freddie Freeman. Gsellman ended up walking Freeman to load the bases.

Mold Glovers: Then Gsellman gave up a gift single to Matt Kemp that fell between our horrible outfielders Curtis Granderson in center and Jay Bruce in right field.

Squeezed: Josh Smoker then came in and was squeezed by the home plate umpire. He walked Nick Markakis to force in a run and make it 2-1 Braves. Fernando Salas then entered and managed to escape further damage.

Nap Time: In the 7th inning, Fernando Salas was pulled after giving up a single and then retiring the pitcher. Terry brought in Jerry Blevins to face Inciarte, and he gave up a single. Then he left Blevins in to face the righty Met Killer Adonis Garcia. I saw the home run coming. He’s hit like .300 against the Mets this year with multiple soul crushing homers. I saw it coming a mile away. The three run shot made it 5-1. Goddamn the Braves.

The Runs and Final Mistakes: In the 8th inning, Asdrubal Cabrera walked and Yoenis Cespedes was hit by a pitch. Then Grandy doubled to make it 5-2 and T.J. Rivera added a sac fly to make it 5-3. Then the Braves brought in the lefty for Jay Bruce and the Mets pinch hit for him. Bruce’s early onset METS disease has become so bad that he’s being pinch hit for!!! Pray for Bruce! He’s dunzo. Anyway Terry pinch hit Eric Campbell, and I don’t care that he hit an RBI single to make it 5-4. It’s still the wrong move. The lefties on the bench are better major league hitters. Period.

D’Arnaud is Garbage: In the second inning with two men on and one out Travis d’Arnaud failed to deliver a hit. In the 8th inning, he came up with runners on the corners and two outs. Terry should have pinch hit for him. He’s terrible. He grounded out and failed to tie the game. He has one of the worst cases of METS disease I’ve ever seen. He’s lost all his skills in one offseason. He has to be hiding an injury. Book it.

METS Disease: Ray Ramirez will need to study the bodies of Bruce and d’Arnaud in the offseason to see what he can learn about METS disease prevention. Speaking of our legendary training staff, the Mets fired former assistant trainer Mike Herbst from the organization. Herbst was best known for his use of bloodletting to cure the plague of sweat sickness that swept through the Mets clubhouse in the early 2000s. His medieval methods will not be missed.

Yo Ain’t Hitting So We Out: Yo came up with a man on and two outs in the 9th inning and struck out on a breaking ball. He missed the pitch before his strikeout so badly that he fell over while swinging. He’s cold right now. And as a result the offense is bad again. It ain’t rocket science. Without Yo we’ve got nada. The Mets failed to hit with runners in scoring position throughout the game.

Braves Have Nothing To Lose: In the third inning, Asdrubal Cabrera doubled and the Braves threw over to second base so many times. They forced Cabrera and his bum knee to dive back and forth. He looked like he badly aggravated his knee multiple times. Then in the 8th inning they nailed Yoenis Cespedes on the arm with a pitch. Screw the Braves. They’ve got nothing to lose, and they are successfully punishing and embarrassing the Mets.

Today: The Wild Card race is a three way tie. Let’s salvage a game against the Braves at home. You gotta love how once again we can’t take advantage of our “easy schedule”.

One thought on “Old Man Collins Fell Asleep

  1. Pingback: Pittsburgh Pirates Wild Card Watch - Revival Edition

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