Final Score: Nationals 7, Mets 4

Harvey’s METS Disease Fever Rises: Well in super predictable fashion, Harvey’s skills and abilities did not magically reappear five days after he was blown out at Citi Field. METS disease isn’t one of those things where all of a sudden your skills come back as quickly as they evaporated. Look at Jason Bay, Ike Davis, and even Michael Cuddyer. They lost their skills, and they never came back again. Michael Cuddyer had one of the fastest acting cases of METS ever recorded. He was acquired and within 12 months it was all over for poor Michael. Now it’s up to Harvey to take a break from the game and search for the cure as so many Mets players have attempted to do before him.

HarveyDay Game Recap: Last night’s game wasn’t pretty. Matt Harvey ran into trouble in the second inning when he gave up a single to Ryan Zimmerman and walked Anthony Rendon. But he managed to retire Wilson Ramos and Danny Espinosa to escape the inning. It was clear in the second inning though that his stuff was flat. It’s not even about a lack of velocity. He’s just not fooling anybody, and he was leaving everything up. The wheels started to shake in the 4th when he gave up back to back solo home runs to Ryan Zimmerman and Anthony Rendon. They both crushed two flat ass 86 MPH changeups. Garbage pitches. The fifth inning was Harvey’s last inning and for good reason. Ben Revere smacked a leadoff double and Jayson Werth singled. Then Bryce Harper crushed a ball to center for a sac fly to make it 3-1. He just missed getting all of the ball. But Daniel Murphy managed to do just that right after Harper’s sac fly. He hit a two run blast to make it 5-1. Harvey managed to get out of the inning. But that was his day. The Nats added solo dingers by Ben Revere (in the 7th) and Wilson Ramos (in the 8th) off of Antonio Bastardo and Jim Henderson respectively, but it was just them piling on late in the game.

Harvey Game 5 9th Inning’d Mets Again: So I’m not sure how anyone didn’t see this coming. I said last week that the guy needed a stint of rest and rehab to work on his problems. I can’t believe Harvey Game 5 9th inning’d the Mets AGAIN. At least the World Series decision made some sense. Harvey had been dominant in that game and deserved to face at least one more Royal. But now?? How in the world did he convince Terry AND Sandy? His stuff is flat, and he needs a vacation. Get him outta here. Get him fixed. His shoes will be there waiting to be filled by Zack Wheeler in July. No pressure Zack.

Harvey Flips Off Media: Today’s top story in the media isn’t Matt Harvey’s performance by the way. The top story is that he left the game last night without speaking to the press. The mainstream media has been lashing Harvey in print forever because he comes off as a pompous super competitive prick from New England. So it’s no suprise that they chose the lowest moment of his professional career and possibly his life to crucify him in the papers. Go to hell mainstream news. Why don’t you get the hell out of my face with your BS Harvey stories and go make up some more racist “Yoenis Cespedes is a clubhouse cancer” headlines. The mook beat writers would rather have Harvey show up at his locker and give them the old Marshawn Lynch treatment. Unbelievable.

Cabrera: Asdrubal Cabrera hit a solo blast in the fourth inning. Where would we be without this guy? Signing a real shortstop instead of continuing to voluntarily have bad ones on the roster was a brilliant strategy.

Thanks For Everything Soup: Soup was almost our entire offense last night. That’s a problem. The Mets added a run on an Eric Campbell ground out in the 7th inning. Campbell only had a chance to have a productive out because Cespedes led off the inning with a double. I was so angry about this game, that I nearly missed Eric Campbell’s garbage time two run blast in the 9th inning. Neil Walker walked and Campbell lined one over the fence in left field. Hot Soup!

Cotton Candy Soft Lineup: Speaking of Eric Campbell, we got a glimpse of our lineup without Lucas Duda and David Wright last night. The star studded squad included Ty Kelly, Kevin Plawecki, AND Eric Campbell. That pillow soft ass lineup cannot be out there much longer. It’s unacceptable. Sandy knows the new lineup is El Stinko. Make a move now please.

Plawecki Needs Seasoning: If it wasn’t already abundantly clear, I’m pretty sure his 0 for 3 performance last night combined with his .186 average has convinced me that Plawecki needs more time in the minor leagues. The sad part is there’s no chance that happens without a trade. As I said in the spring, Kevin Plawecki is the second best catcher in the organization and the only option behind Travis d’Arnaud. Without d’Arnaud, Plawecki and his .186 average is still the best option. I mean for God’s sake, Rene Rivera is hitting .105. I don’t care how many baserunners he throws out trying to steal, the guy can’t hit and isn’t a real option. I hate to end this section with the same refrain but, make a move now please.

Loney’s Out At First?: So the great first basemen search kicked off yesterday and apparently the reps for James Loney reached out to the Mets because he can opt out of his minor league deal in San Diego. Mets fans were complaining about this option right away as if we will have once chance to get this right. Umm it’s called taking a flier people. We can change our mind in 10 hours or in 45 days. In short, I think Loney is a fine idea if Sandy agrees. That being said, it may not matter because San Diego first basemen Wil Myers missed last night’s game with forearm pain. Good thing the dog doo San Diego Padres have depth at first base otherwise they might have been in trouble. Scratch one name off our search list.

Panic City’s Positive Police: There is a small but vocal contingent of positive Mets fans. They are probably just positive people in general. The members of team positivity spent yesterday ranting about how the Mets are fewer than 5 games behind the Cubs for the best record in baseball. Sure yeah everything is fine. We hit lots of dingers, our pen is the best in the league, and Thor is a golden god. Let’s just ignore that our other ace Matt Harvey has METS disease, David Wright is living with METS disease and one setback away from the DL, Lucas Duda is out forever, Travis d’Arnaud spends his days getting rehab rub downs, Wilmer Flores is rehabbing his injury in Double-A/trying to learn how to hit again, and Eric Campbell plays every day now. The positive folk sit in their gorgeous mansions in the best neighborhood of Panic City. Meanwhile I’m hustling over here in the PC tenements trying to make a damn living and keep my heart rate at a normal level every time Yoenis Cespedes slides into second base or avoids a pitch up and in.

Today: Okay on a positive note, we should win this road series. We have Steven Matz going in today’s game, and he’s been arguably the top member of the MLB rookie stud team. A split against Washington in our first six games would be fantastic. Losing 4 out of 6 would not be. Pray for Harvey.