Let’s Keep Pretending The Mets Have A Chance

“I better reserve my Corporate box at Citi Field for the 2016 playoffs before the Mets sellout!”


Wow what a game last night! Matt Harvey almost pitched a perfect game, but he lost it in the 8th inning on an infield hit. But a complete game one-hitter is still very impressive. Daniel Murphy and Yoenis Cespedes each hit two-run homers and Lucas Duda added a solo shot. David Wright went 3 for 4. What a game! The Mets opened up a 10 game lead over the Nationals in the NL East. 2016 is the best season ever!

The Crushing Reality: That was fun. I’d rather just be delusional and pretend this team is good. There’s no point in paying attention to the actual games any more. It’s all over. The garbage D-Backs absolutely destroyed the real 2016 Mets last night. If it wasn’t for a 9th inning garbage time solo dinger from Curtis Granderson and a two-run shot from Rene Rivera, the Mets lose this game 13-2. But a 13-5 loss is just as embarrassing. Jon Niese didn’t make it through 5 innings and gave up homers to Rickie Weeks Jr. and Yasmany Tomas in the fourth inning. No surprise there. Mr. Mistake pitch strikes again. The Mets brought in an overworked Commissioner Erik Goeddel, and he promptly surrendered a long ball. Then our mop up crew of Gabriel Ynoa and Josh Edgin were crushed by the D-Backs.

Let’s Pretend Jose Can Stay Healthy: Jose Reyes has been on a tear since he returned from the DL. I almost picked him up in my fantasy league last night, and then I remembered he’ll probably swing tomorrow and simultaneously snap his ribs while dislocating his hip.

Let’s Pretend Johnson Is Here To Stay: Kelly Johnson had 3 hits in last night’s game. He’s been fantastic since coming over from the Braves for the second year in a row. Let’s pretend the Mets will be smart enough to keep him on a one-year deal this offseason. Fat chance.

Let’s Pretend Bruce Won’t Catch METS Disease: Jay Bruce is off to a poor start as a Met, but he did hit an RBI double last night. I’m sure he’ll excel for the rest of the season with Yoenis Cespedes in the lineup, and then once the Mets let Yo go Bruce’s performance will suffer and everyone will pretend it’s happening for a different reason.

Let’s Pretend Loney Is Better Than Duda: James Loney has been a decent fill-in for Lucas Duda. But he went 0 for 5 last night and over his last 15 games he’s been horrendous (.193/.207/.211). Let’s pretend he’s a gold glove first basemen that hits .300.

Let’s Pretend Rivera Is The New Wright: T.J. Rivera is hitting .346 since his promotion from Vegas. I’m sure he’s the long term answer at third base and not some 27 year old fringe prospect.

Let’s Pretend Vegas Isn’t The Moon: Michael Conforto is batting like .900 since being demoted to Vegas like a week ago. Now everyone wants him to be called up again. Let’s just pretend Vegas numbers mean something.

Let’s Pretend We Have Pitching Depth: Jon Niese and our bullpen was rocked last night. Where are all these reserve arms we heard so much about? We traded them all away for Kelly Johnson didn’t we? Let’s pretend we didn’t.

Let’s Pretend Terry Is A Great Manager: I guess the Mets are going to let Terry stick around until the end of the season? I mean we’ll know the answer this weekend. If the Mets are swept by the Giants in San Francisco and Terry is here on Monday, then he’s here to stay for 2016. How is that possible?

Let’s Pretend Yo and Co. Will Boost The Mets: Cespedes is back on Friday. Asdrubal Cabrera will be back too. It’ll be interesting to see if the Mets continue to play .400 baseball or if they propel the team to a slightly better level. We kind of need to play .700 now. Is that possible? Can that happen? The Cardinals are actually taking off in the second Wild Card spot now. It was only a matter of time before that happened. Well it’s happening. Let’s pretend it isn’t.

Let’s Pretend A Two Year Tommy John Recovery Is Normal:  Zack Wheeler received “good” news from the doctor. He didn’t blow out his elbow again! Hooray! Apparently it’s just a flexor strain. He’ll be shutdown for 2 weeks and miss the rest of the season. I can’t believe he missed two full seasons due to Tommy John and other arm issues. They obviously misdiagnosed the METS disease in his arm. That explains why the flesh is melting off. Whatever. Two years of Wheeler’s prime down the toilet. No biggie.

Let’s Pretend Matz and Thor Are Healthy: It won’t be long now. Noah Syndergaard and Steven Matz are going to be shutdown and get their San Antonio elbow Spurs fixed. The day we officially waive the white flag in 2016 is going to be very sad. In 2015 the team had luck and the players had a temporary reprieve from METS disease. 2016 was back to business as usual for the old Mets.

Today: We play the Giants later at 10:15 (EST). I’ll be asleep by 11:45 (EST) dreaming of next season.

2 thoughts on “Let’s Keep Pretending The Mets Have A Chance

  1. Rick

    Nice column. I am not a Met fan. But I am very interested in their pitching staff. Or so I thought. Matt Harvey is 29-28 lifetime. Not for nothing but when Whitey Ford suffered his 28th loss he had 80 wins. Jacob will be 29 before the All Star game next year. Matz and Noah are a pitch away from surgery. All of a sudden the Yankees have a better record and a brighter future than the Mets. Which is nice.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha. Well it definitely doesn’t surprise me that the Yankees have righted the ship in half a season. They are the Yankees and they always seem to get their act together.

      As far as the Mets go, I just think 2016 hasn’t been a lucky year for them and I still like our chances with these arms in the long run. They’re all fiery competitors and they’ll get healthy. At least that’s what I’m telling myself.


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