Well well well, the Jenrry Mejia situation has finally come to a head. On Monday, Jenrry Mejia’s lawyer Vincent White announced he was suing Major League Baseball for what he called the “corrupt, mob-like activity” that surrounded the Mejia steroid controversy. MLB thought they could just silence Jenrry with a lifetime banishment. They thought they could just make his lawyer go away with the old “frivolous baseless allegations” line. No way in hell. The Mejia Conspiracy runs too goddamn deep to just go away. Now we’re hearing about years of corruption in the MLB offices in addition to the obvious “witch hunt” that was launched by MLB to bring Jenrry down. Well I for one am all in on the Mejia conspiracy. If you pay attention to all the details of the case, the cover up is all too obvious. You really think he just tested positive three times by accident? No way. This wasn’t just about three “positive tests” that happened over the span of 12 months. This was a long calculated takedown of one of the games most obscure injury-plagued middle relief talents. And it started years ago.
At a minimum, I think it’s clear the final straw was the foot stomp. The Mejia Foot Stomp was Jennry’s signature move. It was the bat flip of the pitcher’s mound. Obviously Goose Gossage and the MLB higher-ups would have none of it. The message came down from the top in 2014 and the Mets put a stop to it. And of course they did. Sandy is just an MLB stooge. He worked in the MLB offices for God’s sake. He’s on the freaking payroll. So Jenrry toned it done, but Goose and company knew that would never be enough. They had to be rid of the stomp forever. So they tricked him into juicing. The Mets training staff must have given him steroid laced “protein” shakes and weekly “health injections”.
But the league knew when he returned in July of 2015 that he would bring the foot stomp back with him. They had to take quick and decisive action. So they contaminated his tests. They just mixed up some of the old sample with the new one and got the positive result they needed. That’s why he kept testing positive for the same steroid. You think he’d be dumb enough to just keep doing steroids and do the same one over and over? That’s insane. The league had to be rid of his headline dominating on mound late-inning relief antics.
We need to find out who exactly was involved in this conspiracy and how high up and far back this thing goes.
- Did Tony Bernazard rip his shirt off in the Double-A Binghamton clubhouse in 2009 and flip out on the players because Mejia’s AA teammates all knew the Mets were setting up Mejia even back then and were threatening to reveal the truth?
- Did Omar Minaya start orchestrating Mejia’s takedown right around the time he fired Bernazard and falsely accused Adam Rubin of wanting a front office job? Was the Rubin front office rumor true, and if so did Mejia know about it?
- Did the Mets bullpen coach Ricky Bones know about the conspiracy as far back as 2014? How did Bones know? Who the hell is Ricky Bones?
- Is Wally Backman still allowed to manage at Triple-A and destroy all the young arms in our organization because he knows the truth, and the permanent managing gig is the only way he’ll stay quiet?
- Did the lab technician that mishandled (i.e. mailed it 12 hours “late”) the steroid filled Ryan Braun urine sample also handle Mejia’s? If so will Ryan Braun insist on ruining the technician’s life again?
- Did Bartolo Colon tell Mejia how to get the super secret stem cell injections in his arm before or after the second positive test? Is it possible that the stem cells were donated by Bud Selig, and he had to cover it up to protect his own wrinkly skin?
- Did Bud Selig personally create the contaminated third sample or did he order Rob Manfred to do it? Is Joe Torre involved? If so does Torre’s involvement mean the Yankees should be stripped of all their championships between 1996-2009?
- Did Chase Utley injure Ruben Tejada in the 2015 NLDS because Ruben knew the truth about the Mejia Conspiracy and was threatening to go public and had to be silenced? Is that why the Mets released Ruben in Spring Training? Was Noah Syndergaard tossed when he threw at Utley because he knew something?
- Did the Mets approach Jeurys Familia about becoming the new closer before the Mejia suspension? Did they blackmail Familia to keep him quiet? Were his inexplicable blown saves in the World Series part of the agreement?
- What about this. Mejia made his debut in 2010. Then all of a sudden after the 2011 season the Mets traded Angel Pagan away for two mediocre players (Andres Torres and Ramon Ramirez). Mejia took over as closer in 2014, but right after the 2013 season the Mets just let Justin Turner go. Why? Why did we get rid of all these good players? Was it to keep them quiet? Did we get rid of Daniel Murphy because of something he knew? Why did they all become better players once they left? Did Mejia and all of his steroid filled protein smoothies have something to do with it?
- Tell me this. What did the Wilpons know? Is it a coincidence that Mejia was rushed to make his MLB debut in 2010 which was the same year that the Wilpons were named in the Bernie Madoff lawsuit? Were the Wilpons allowed to keep the team because of the Mejia Conspiracy? If so will that change now because of the lawsuit? Please?
All I know is we can’t just let this one go. We can’t just let Jenrry Mejia remain an insignificant piece of MLB history and steroid lore. We need to know the truth. Or we can just accept that Jenrry Mejia is a moron who didn’t know how to follow his trainer’s instructions regarding how to beat a steroid test. I suppose that’s a remote possibility.
2 thoughts on “I’m All In On The Mejia Conspiracy”
Not since the days of Chaucer has a more prolific piece of satire been written.
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Anyone looking at this situation from the outside would think, “Gee, there’;s no way a human being could actually do something wrong, get caught, do it again, get caught again, then do it yet again in a 1 year span. That goes for any line of work, baseball, the medical field, even government politics, etc… Then they met Jenrry.
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