Asdrubal Cabrera’s Body Sent Back to NYC And Like That, Poof…It’s Tejada


The greatest trick the Mets ever pulled was convincing us we had a new Shortstop and like that, poof. It’s Ruben. 

Should we trade Ruben? I hear the Cardinals are interested in Ruben Tejada. Who needs depth? We have Asdrubal Cabrera now so let’s get rid of Ruben before all his NLDS medical bills come due. And now…Cabrera’s knee has popped. Whoops. Back to the usual suspects at SS.

This was an absolute lock. As soon as Cabrera pulled up lame during yesterday’s game we all knew he was a goner. We’ve seen it too many times to be fooled. And he wasn’t exactly hiding it when he came out of the game. I mean he said he was fine but this photo said it all.  

Clearly Ray Ramirez loaded him up with painkillers. Just your standard Mets post-injury dose. Make all the pain go away. Ray Ramirez has made a living on career ending diagnoses. He knows what they look like. Once they said Cabrera was going for his first Mets MRI (Congratulations!) it was only a question of how bad.

Degenerative __________.

Malignant___________.

Genetic___________.

Personally, I was betting on the injury being some newly discovered knee condition. Then we heard this morning, Cabrera was being sent back to the special, different MRI machine in New York for further evaluation, and at that moment we knew he was being sent back in a body bag.

Anyway, this isn’t surprising. Of course somebody in the starting lineup got injured. Injuries happen to every team all season long and especially to the Mets. But it’s even more predictable that it happened at SS. We finally signed someone new. Finally signed a real SS. The first one we’ve had since Jose Reyes. And just like that, it’s back to the incumbent. Wilmer Flores cried his eyes out when he thought he was traded last season. Ruben never batted an eyelash at all these trade rumors. He’s been here before. He’s seen all the ghosts of Shortstops Past. Nobody is taking this job from him. Not trade rumors. Not Omar Quintanilla. Not even Chase Utley can stop him.

Now the Mets say we are probably talking about a short term injury. Asdrubal Cabrera has a strained patella tendon and is supposedly going to be inactive for 2 weeks. However, he’s currently getting your standard “day to day” platelet-rich plasma therapy at the Hospital for Special Surgery. And we all know the Mets injury conversion formula tells us weeks are months and the time given by trainer Ray Ramirez should be multiplied by 3. So we are looking at a 6 month absence. That being said, I hope this finally silences the goddamn people saying we should trade Alejandro De Aza and trade Ruben. We need these damn players. Depth is important.

P.S. I realize Wilmer Flores is now the actual starting SS “on paper”. But I didn’t mention it because we all know Wilmer is actually going to start at 3B. David Wright hasn’t even swung a bat or fielded a ball in a real game this spring. He’s been on the “day to day” injury list for the last 4 years. The Mets have been secretly flying Wright’s spine back to New York for evaluation every other week while David “works out” in Port St. Lucie. Wilmer is going to play 3B. Tejada is going to play SS and….wait for it…Eric Campbell is going to be our super sub. Soup’s on baby! Hip hip hooray.

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2 thoughts on “Asdrubal Cabrera’s Body Sent Back to NYC And Like That, Poof…It’s Tejada

  1. Pingback: Weekly Roundup: The Big Guns Debut – The Metssiah

  2. Pingback: 2016 Mets Season Preview: We Watched, Now We Win – The Metssiah

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