April Sucking Brings May Sucking 

Final Score: Marlins 4, Mets 2

I can’t believe that positive “glass half full” Mets fans exist. I checked Twitter after the game, and obviously there is a large contingent of fans losing their minds over the awful series in Miami. But there are still these fans trying to put a positive spin on a 4-3 road trip and fans talking about how we could have easily won 3 out of 4 against the Marlins if a few things went our way. Ummmmm we beat the pathetic NL East punching bag Phillies, and we were embarrassed by the Marlins losing 3 of 4 in Miami. There is no positive spin. If Travis “Dead Legs” d’Arnaud doesn’t somehow sock that 16th inning home run, we probably lose all four games to the Marlins. Getting beat by divisional opponents at any point in the season is a disaster. Wake up people.

Metsanity: The Metssiah wrote about this in the season preview. Sandy is using the same roster again and expecting different results. Well in this series the Mets for the most part did what they’ve consistently done over the last few seasons. The offense sucked (i.e. failed to hit the long ball enough) in the three losses, and we squandered three fantastic starting pitching performances by Noah Syndergaard, Jacob deGrom, and Matt Harvey. Same team, same story.

April Sucking Brings May Sucking: Last season this team had a strong April and then basically played mediocre baseball until a late August/September surge. Is it too much to ask this team to perform at an above average level for a long stretch this season? I really hope April sucking doesn’t bring more sucking in May.

Dark Knight: Harvey gave up 2 runs (1 ER) on 6 hits over 6 innings. Our crappy defense helped the Marlins score their first run. Harvey should be disgusted with the team’s performance.

No Hitter Watch: Marlins pitcher Dan Straily walked 5 Mets over 5.1 innings but did not surrender one hit. The Mets didn’t get a goddamn hit until the 8th inning. With two outs and two men on in the 9th inning Asdrubal Cabrera managed to drive in two runs with an RBI single and tie the game. His late game heroics just delayed the inevitable meltdown by our bullpen.

So Mets: In the bottom of the 9th inning Addison Reed gave up a leadoff single and then with one out he gave up a double to Miguel Rojas to left field. Yoenis Cespedes fired a bullet to Asdrubal Cabrera who then fired a perfect throw to Travis d’Arnaud to nail the runner at the plate for the second out. Annnnnd then J.T. Riddle followed that with a game winning two run homer. Lol Mets.

Short Arms: It’s almost as if the Mets bullpen is lacking a couple of dependable relievers, and as a result we’ve been forced to overwork the quality arms so much that they are no longer effective. But it’s not like the Mets could have predicted this would happen in 2017. I mean sure it happened last season, and I also wrote fifty offseason blog posts saying the Mets need to bolster their bullpen. But other than that there was no way of seeing this coming. We seriously need Jeurys Familia back ASAP.

Stop The Madness: Curtis Granderson is hitting .174, Jose Reyes is hitting .087, and Terry continues to flip flop them in the leadoff spot. Ummm Curtis is old and Reyes looks washed up. Start Michael Conforto and lead him off tomorrow. Enough is enough. When the offense struggles you shake things up. There’s no reason to keep running these two veterans out there when you have viable alternatives.

Scapegoat Time: Speaking of Reyes’ horrendous play, how is it possible that the fan base hasn’t turned on this guy yet? He allegedly threw his wife into a glass door, he reportedly has two families and doesn’t support one of them, and now he’s playing like crap. Fans are always desperate for a scapegoat, yet I hear nothing negative being tossed Jose’s way. Yoenis Cespedes had one game where he failed to slide in a key spot and some asshole fans start questioning his work ethic and dedication. Where’s the Jose outrage? Where are the Jose Reyes boos? I have a feeling the anti-Jose/pro-Amed Rosario noise will pick up if Jose’s awful play drags into May.

Next Game: Okay I’m done ranting. Now we get to play Philly again on Tuesday. Praise Jesus.

Terry Ruins Night, Kills Salas 

Final Score: Marlins 5, Mets 4

The Mets had a dominant Jacob deGrom on the mound striking out one Marlins hitter after another. In the 7th and 8th inning the offense finally picked up our co-ace and gave deGrom a 4-2 lead. And…Terry managed to blow the goddamn game.

Terry’s A Moron: DeGrom struck out 13 Marlins over 7 innings giving up 2 runs on 4 hits. He had 97 pitches after the 7th inning. Terry had a choice. He could have sent his dominant stud starting pitcher back to the mound to see if he could retire a few more hitters before creeping too far above 100 pitches. Or he could have turned to his extremely overworked bullpen. Terry decided to turn to the overworked bullpen and specifically he turned to Fernando Salas who has seemingly been used in every game this season. Salas coughed up the game by giving up back to back homers to Christian Yelich and Giancarlo Stanton. Salas is dead. Terry killed him two weeks into the season.

Dead Pen: After the game when asked why he didn’t stick with deGrom, Terry had the balls to say he didn’t want to put his young starter’s arm at risk this early in the season. Meanwhile Salas’ arm is buried, Hansel Robles has his shriveled arm soaking in formaldehyde, and Jerry Blevins is going from situational lefty to a lefty used in every situation. At this rate Jerry’s going to wish his arm was broken again to avoid the Terry bullpen torture treatment.

Brutal Loss: This was a brutal loss to a divisional foe. Not only did we lose our chance to win this road series, but we’ll be lucky to split the series on Sunday. We all know these Terry losses add up over the course of the season, but they also take a huge emotional toll on the fans and on the players.

The Marlins Mets’d Us: The Marlins gave the Mets the home run treatment in this game. Justin Bour and Marcell Ozuna hit solo homers off deGrom. Christian Yelich hit the two run blast off Salas and Stanton hit a solo shot.

Walkyear: Neil Walker had a nice game with two hits and an RBI on his double in the first inning.

Picked Up Jake: I wish I could be excited about the 7th inning that our offense had, but Terry took the wind out of my sails. Neil Walker executed a smart bunt single to leadoff the inning against Adam Conley. Then Curtis Granderson tripled to right field which tied the game. Yelich almost caught the ball. Then Mattingly yanked Conley who always looks like goddamn Cy Young against the Mets. Michael Conforto followed that with a sac fly (nearly a home run) to give the Mets the lead (3-2). Asdrubal Cabrera also added a solo blast in the 8th inning (4-2). It was all for naught.

Tomorrow: Let’s hope the Mets split the series. Hopefully Matt Harvey continues his rise from the dead on Easter Sunday.

Thor’s Fingernail Falls Off, Yo Has Flu

Final Score: Marlins 3, Mets 2

Poor Noah Syndergaard. Last night Thor had the distinct privilege of pitching on Yo’s night off which typically guarantees that the offense will struggle. As expected the offense failed to execute and the Mets took the L. Oh and Thor’s fingernail basically fell off, and he left the game early. Which is just greaaaaat.

Meh Thor, Defense: Noah Syndergaard wasn’t at his most dominant, but he still shut down the Marlins offense for most of the game. He went 6 innings, gave up 2 runs (1 earned) on 6 hits and only struck out 4. The Mets defense screwed up in the first inning (error by Asdrubal Cabrera) to set up the Marlins first run (sac fly). Thor gave up a second run in the 5th inning.

Pee Bucket: Around the 5th/6th inning we all saw Syndergaard looking at his finger in the dugout on TV. I immediately thought it was the blister acting up again. I figured Ray Ramirez would prep a nice full bucket of urine so he could give those hands a good Moises Alou style soaking between innings and then send Thor back out to the mound. But it turned out that his fingernail was apparently bent backwards and bleeding. So now we have our ace dealing with another random finger issue. I’m sure it’ll all work out and magically disappear.

Left On Base: Without Yoenis Cespedes in the lineup the Mets left the world on base. Eleven total base runners were left stranded. They left bases loaded in the second inning, two men on in the third inning, one in the fourth inning, one in the fifth inning, one in the sixth inning, one in the seventh inning, and two in the eighth inning. Yo struck out as a pinch hitter in the eighth with one man on base.

The Flu Game (in April): Terry said before last night’s game that Yo was getting the night off because he played the 16 inning game with the flu. He hit two home runs and played 16 innings with the goddamn flu!! Yo is really an animal. But the real question is why the hell is Terry starting Cespedes in April with the flu? I realize we won the game, and Yo was the primary reason we won (like he is every night). But I still think it’s absurd that our manager would start our best player in April with the flu. Also, prepare for everyone on the roster to come down with the flu now.

Duda Dong: The offense struggled, but Lucas Duda did hit a solo bomb to center field in the 5th inning.

Replay Conforto: Michael Conforto was a huge factor once again. He hit a sac fly in the third inning. In the 7th inning with the bases loaded and Jerry Blevins pitching, Christian Yelich lined a ball to Conforto in left field. The runner at third tried for home and Mike nailed him at the plate. It was a close play but replay review confirmed the call. I thought it was the exact same scenario as the play at the plate in the 16 inning game except the league made the opposite decision. The call on Conforto’s throw was “out” and there wasn’t enough evidence to overturn the call. So they upheld it. Two nights ago the call on the Yo play at the plate was safe. There wasn’t enough evidence to overturn that call but the replay officials overturned it anyway. They never follow consistent standards. It sucks.

Fire Edgin: In the 9th inning it felt like we were about to start another marathon extra inning game. But Josh Edgin ensured that wouldn’t happen when he gave up the walkoff run. The Mets have a chunky bearded reliever named Josh who stinks and a chunky bearded reliever named Josh who is decent. It’s time to dump the stinky one. On the bright side, at least the loss in the 9th ensured Terry’s favorite new bullpen toy Fernando Salas didn’t pitch. His arm will survive for another night.

Murph: Just a reminder that Daniel Murphy is hitting like .450 this month. I will never get over the transformation from net negative Murph to MVP Murph. I will be bitter about it for the rest of my life.

Today: Jacob deGrom faces Adam Conley. Let’s rebound and smack this lefty. Hopefully he’s still drained after blowing the 16 inning game.

I Fell Asleep For The Good Of The Team

Final Score (in 16 innings): Mets 9, Marlins 8

I had dinner plans last night, and the restaurant had no TV. I figured I’d miss 80% of the game and occasionally tune out during the meal to get the game highlights on my phone. I never would have thought that by the time I returned home I’d have three hours of baseball left to watch.

Dinner Recap: At the restaurant I let out a frustrated grunt and aggressively dipped my bread in oil when Robert Gsellman gave up a first inning grand slam to Marcell Ozuna. I pumped my fist and ordered another cocktail when Travis d’Arnaud drove in 3 runs with a triple and Curtis Granderson added an RBI single to tie the game in the second inning. And yes I watched replays at the table of Yo’s third and fifth inning solo shots and the Wilmer Flores third inning solo job.

Gsellman And The Stinky Josh: The lead didn’t feel safe. It felt like Gsellman was a risk to fall apart at any time, and the bullpen has been used so much lately I figured every arm was a liability to some degree. The Gsellman meltdown occurred in the 5th inning. By the time Terry woke up and pulled him from the game it was 7-6 Mets. Then instead of turning to Jerry Blevins to face a big lefty in a pivotal spot, Terry went with stinky Josh Edgin who gave up two runs on two hits. I’ve seen enough of Edgin. He’s officially the worst lefty in the pen and the stinky Josh. He needs to go.

I’m Back: By the time I made it home it was the top of the 7th. Yoenis Cespedes had reached base on a wild pitch strikeout, and he advanced to second on another wild pitch. With two outs Jay Bruce hit a single to left field and Yo decided to challenge Marcell Ozuna’s arm and try to score. He was initially called safe but the play was overturned upon replay review.

To Hell With MLB And The Yo No Hustle People: My only thoughts on that play are:

  1. Yo should have slid into home (duh).
  2. Neil Walker should have been signaling for him to slide.
  3. MLB was wrong to overturn the call. The replay office sucks, and they change their definition of incontrovertible (irrefutable? Whatever word they use) evidence every single game. Pathetic.
  4. If you’re one of these people who saw that non-slide at the plate and took that opportunity to talk about how Yo didn’t hustle to first base on the wild pitch third strike and how he didn’t slide back into second base when the pitcher threw over and how he doesn’t hustle in general then I hate you. The guy is going to hit 40 home runs this year and he needs his fragile legs intact to support his enormous freak upper body. Let him play the way he plays and shut the hell up.

Early Hero: In the 8th inning with two outs Travis d’Arnaud singled up the middle and then Michael Conforto came in as a pinch hitter. He launched a clutch game tying pinch-hit triple. Play the man. It’s that simple.

The Pen Is Dead: From that point on the Mets offense shut down, and we got to watch all the relievers destroy their arms in April. Fernando Salas went two innings, Addison Reed went two, Tommy John guy Josh Smoker went three innings and Hansel Robles went two innings and made his fourth appearance in a row. Unbelievable performance by all of these relievers but Jesus Christ they must be shot. We’re going to need some reinforcements and a few complete games from our starters to help revive them.

Late Hero: I went to bed after the top of the 15th inning for the good of the team. I knew that if I stayed up Robles was going to blow the game, but if I slept there was a chance we’d hit a go ahead homer. I made the right call because Travis “Four Hit” d’Arnaud crushed a game winning solo shot in the 16th inning. I’m still shocked we won. I feel like we always come out on the losing end of those marathon extra inning games. Big win.

Today: Noah Syndergaard faces Edinson Volquez. Let’s make it a six game winning streak tonight.

King Wheeler Leads The Mets To Victory 

Final Score: Mets 5, Phillies 4

King Wheeler reigned for five prosperous innings last night before tiring and briefly ceding the throne to known pretender Hansel Robles who nearly destroyed everything Zack had accomplished during his tenure on the mound. The offense was led by new leadoff man Lord Conforto of Italy, red hot Venezuelan knight Asdrubal Cabrera, and of course the real King of Flushing, Yoenis Cespedes.

Leadoff Man Conforto: Initially it seemed like Conforto made his way into the lineup because Curtis Granderson was scratched with an injury, but the team later confirmed it was simply a day off for Curtis. Michael Conforto did not disappoint in the leadoff spot. He was involved in or directly responsible for most of the early scoring. He led off the game with a single and Yoenis Cespedes drove him in with a double to left field. Then in the third inning he hit an opposite field solo homer to make it 2-0.

Doing What Had To Be Done: Conforto is doing exactly what he had to do to keep his spot on the major league roster. He’s mashing in his limited number of plate appearances. Now the Mets will look terrible if they demote him. As I’ve said many times, the Mets need to continuously rotate these outfielders. Conforto leading off and playing in center/right field a few days a week makes perfect sense. Grandy is old and Conforto is the highest ceiling bat we have on the roster other than Cespedes.

Cabby Is A New York Guy: In the 5th Inning the Phillies hit Travis d’Arnaud with a pitch and then walked Zack Wheeler and Michael Conforto to load the bases. Asdrubal Cabrera followed that with a 2-RBI single up the right field line to make it 4-0 Mets. Cabby is such a New York performer. Never in a million years did I think he’d show up, put on a Mets uniform, and play better than he has at any point in his career. But that’s what he’s done while he’s played in Flushing. Yoenis Cespedes also added a sac fly in the 5th inning to make it 5-0. That run turned out to be the winning run.

Shattered Wrist: When Travis d’Arnaud was hit by a pitch on the wrist, Ray Ramirez came out of the dugout and Travis proceeded to sprint away from him. It was a priceless image that epitomized every fans’ opinion of Ray Ramirez. Also d’Arnaud’s wrist is certainly going to fall off in the next 72 hours.

Is The Real Wheeler Standing Up?: Zack Wheeler looked great over 5 innings last night but in the 6th inning he hit a wall. It’s not surprising to see Zack tire early considering he’s missed two seasons, and he’s still working his way back from injury. At the same time, this is the kind of pitcher he’s been his entire career. These first two starts are really a microcosm of his young career.

In his first start he lacked command, and that has always been one of his flaws. He had his velocity against the Marlins, but it didn’t matter. He just couldn’t execute. Last night he pitched to contact and was able to retire the Phillies lineup with ease. He was able to consistently throw his breaking ball for strikes and locate his fastball. But at the same time he fizzled out in the middle of the game. He’s always been a 5-6 inning pitcher.

Before we leap to any judgments, we still need to see what he looks like once he’s fully stretched out. He still needs to show he can master the strike zone on a more consistent basis. And also he needs to show he can stay healthy. Mainly that.

Robles Is The Worst: It was clear early in the sixth inning that Wheeler was tiring. But Terry let it drag out and left him in the game to load the bases. He finally pulled him with two outs and the bases juiced. Then who did Terry turn to? Hansel Robles. Robles came in and surrendered a grand slam to Maikel Franco on the first pitch. He’s really a piece of crap.

Sandy’s Guys: Fernando Salas and Addison Reed slammed the door on this game. I still can’t believe Sandy targeted and brought in these two guys for basically nothing. They’ve been electric out of the pen for the Mets. I’m looking forward to the return of Jeurys Familia. The back end of the bullpen could turn out to be better than originally expected with those three arms making the bulk of the appearances. We need one more reliable guy to step up. It doesn’t look like Robles is going to be that guy.

Today: The Mets swept the Phillies. Congratulations. Now Robert Gsellman takes on Wei-Yin Chen and the Marlins. It’s time for the Mets to show the rest of the NL East what we are capable of accomplishing.

Yo Shows It’s Gonna Be A Good Summer

good summer

Final Score: Mets 14, Phillies 4

The Mets’ offense was off to a slow start to the 2017 season. All it took was a few games where the lineup was lifeless to make a seasoned fan like me start to worry about player cold streaks and team strikeouts. Then booooooom. The offense finally broke out led by Yoenis Cespedes and his three home runs. It took one big night from Yo and this slugging squad to remind us that it’s gonna be a good summer.

Also, as a lazy blogging Mets fan looking to relax after a long work day, there’s no better game for me to watch than a 14 run, 20 hit, 7 homer blowout where my team triumphs. As a fan I was just watching the ding dongs fly out and loving every second of it. As a blogger I simply write that the Phillies suck, list all of the Mets ding dongs, and then hit “post.” There’s really nothing else to it.

Phillies Suck: Did I mention the Phillies suck? I never want to go back to a time where Philly isn’t the Mets annual divisional punching bag. I’ll take lopsided Mets’ victories against this Philly squad full of developing fringe major league players any day of the week. And we should also consider playing our home games at Citizens Bank Park. What a bandbox.

The Worst Pitcher In Baseball: It also helped last night that Clay Buchholz is one of the worst pitchers in the sport. The Red Sox were dying to dump him. Somehow the Phillies were duped into adding his useless body to their roster. Last night he gave up 6 runs on 8 hits over 2.1 innings before being yanked due to injury. Pathetic. Then Adam Morgan took over the role of worst pitcher on earth and gave up 4 runs on 7 hits over 3.2 innings including 4 home runs. He was demoted to the minors after the game. LOL.

Mets Ding Dong Recap

1st Inning: Yoenis Cespedes 3-run homer.

4th Inning: Asdrubal Cabrera and Yo (bomb 2.0) with solo blasts.

5th Inning: Yo 3.0- solo blast.

6th Inning: Lucas Duda 450 foot solo monster shot.

8th Inning: Travis d’Arnaud with a 2-run opposite field homer (not a typo).

9th Inning: Solo Duda Dong to close it out.

It wasn’t all home runs either. Jay Bruce hit a 2 RBI single in the second inning. Clay Buchholz managed to revive two struggling Mets hitters in the third inning. Jose Reyes hit a double off Clay to raise his average to like .040. Then Clay exited with an injury and d’Arnaud drove Reyes in with an RBI single. Asdrubal Cabrera also added to his near cycle 4-hit night with an RBI single in the 8th inning. Four hits for Duda and Yo, two hits for Neil Walker, and three for d’Arnaud. It was an absolute hit parade.

Everything Was Great And Nothing Bad Happened Right?: Matt Harvey looked good against the mediocre Phillies lineup. He gave up 2 runs on 5 hits over 5.2 innings. He struck out 6 and only walked 1. And of course he left the game with a tight hamstring because God can’t even give us one night to breathe easy. I’m sure he’ll be fine. Right?

The Boot: Michael Conforto is going to get the roster boot when Juan Lagares is ready to come off the DL this week. I feel bad for Conforto. Terry and Sandy just aren’t giving him a legitimate chance. They haven’t even attempted to rotate him into the lineup. I know he’s a professional baseball player who is paid to be resilient, and I’m just a mook blogger who can barely overcome a damaged cuticle, but I’d have a tough time going back to Vegas this year. He just doesn’t belong there. I still think the Mets will pull the trigger on a Jay Bruce trade if they can get a good late inning reliever, a back-end starter that can eat innings, or a versatile position player that fits better on the roster. I’m not saying they should pull that trigger. I’m just saying I think they will do it if they have the chance. But in reality we all know injuries will take care of the outfield “logjam” in no time at all.

Today: Zack Wheeler vs. Vince Velasquez. Let’s hope Zack has better command of the strike zone tonight. Let’s also hope the slugging continues so it will distract us from the horrendous team defense.

Bruce Launches Payback Moonshot

Final Score: Mets 4, Phillies 3

Based on how the game started, I never thought it would wind up being a feel good night that ended with a pimped out payback homer. DeGrom didn’t have his best command and looked especially shaky in the first inning. But he went full veteran ace mode and settled down to give the club 6 solid innings.

The mook in the Phillies bullpen who gave up the Asdrubal Cabrera bat flip walkoff homer last September decided to throw at Cabby’s head in the 8th inning of a tie game in April. Then Jay Bruce went full payback hero mode and launched a two-run moonshot to give the Mets a 4-2 lead that they would never surrender. (The bad news is the Mets only managed to scrape together four hits against the lowly Phillies and the team defense looked terrible again but let’s ignore that).

DeGrizzled Veteran: Jacob deGrom pitched 6 innings, gave up 2 runs on 6 hits and 2 walks. He only struck out 3 hitters. Mediocre defense in the first inning helped the Phillies score their first run. After a leadoff walk and a force out at second base, Jose Reyes failed to catch an Odubel Herrera pop up behind third base. That set up runners on first and second for Maikel Franco who “singled” on a ball lined up the middle that Curtis Granderson should have been able to play in center field but instead deflected to right field. That loaded the bases for Michael Saunders who drove in the first run with a single and then deGrom walked Cameron Rupp to force in a run. It was 2-0 after the first inning but deGrom settled down.

Big Bruce Ball 1.0: Jay Bruce hit a solo homer in the top of the 4th inning to cut the Phillies lead in half. I love how Jay was public enemy number one all offseason simply by virtue of existing, and now he’s the only guy hitting to start the season. It’s so scripted.

Phillie Blessings: In the top of the 7th inning Jay “Middle of the Action” Bruce walked to leadoff the inning. Then Curtis Granderson hit a ball up the middle fielded by the second baseman who made an errant throw to first base. The error allowed Bruce to advance to third and set up first and third for Neil Walker. Neil hit a sac fly to even the score at 2.

The Old Switcheroo: For some reason in the 7th inning with runners on first and second and two outs, Terry had Michael Conforto on deck to pinch hit for Jacob deGrom but then pulled him in favor of Wilmer Flores against a righty. Wilmer flew out to center. Terry really hates playing Conforto.

Ridiculous Play: In the bottom of the 7th inning, Jerry Blevins came in to replace Josh Smoker who retired the first two batters but then gave up a single and walked a guy. Jerry proceeded to throw a pitch that bounced way out of the strike zone to Odubel Herrera. It was so far out of the zone that the baserunners thought it was going to the backstop. Travis d’Arnaud somehow fielded the ball, threw wildly to second base in an attempt to catch the runner off the base, Cabrera dove and fielded the wild throw, and then he threw to first base and was able to nail the runner at first for the final out of the inning. Thanks to the Phillies for running themselves out of an inning.

BatflipGate Payback
: With one out in the 8th inning, Edubray Ramos sailed a ball over the head of Asdrubal Cabrera as payback for Cabrera’s incredible September 2016 bat flip. The Philly Manager was tossed. Talk about a bonehead move by the reliever late in a tie game. I recently saw an interview with Philly manager Pete Mackanin, and he said he was trying to teach this young Philly squad how to play the game right. This is definitely a teaching moment. Also, Cabrera said after the game he had no idea who the reliever was and why he threw at him. I LOVE when players pretend they have no idea who a guy is as a way to insult them.

Big Bruce Ball 2.0: Once the heat died down after BatflipGate, Jay Bruce launched a two out 1-2 pitch from a lefty reliever into the right field second deck for the ultimate payback bomb. That gave the Mets a 4-2 lead, and it was enough for the victory. Addison Reed gave up a solo blast in the 9th inning but ultimately he sealed the deal.

Bench Jose Please: Jose Reyes is basically batting zero in like 40 at-bats. Terry needs to get him out of the leadoff spot and find a way to give Wilmer Flores and T.J. Rivera some playing time. Jose is not a star like Yoenis Cespedes who gets playing time to work his way out of a slump. Jose is a utility player at this point. If he stinks, he sits. It ain’t hard.

Play Conforto: Grandy blew a play in center in the first inning of this game. Statcast said it was a play made by center fielders 75% of the time. This is just another pointless reminder for Terry to rotate his old outfielders and get Conforto into a game.

Juanny No Bats: Juan Lagares is due back from the DL soon. Maybe even this weekend. The outfield defense has been so bad that Terry is going to wind up playing Juanny no bats. I’m sure that’ll boost the offense.

Today: Matt Harvey takes on Clay Buchholz. Clay is one of the the worst pitchers in baseball. We must crush him. Hopefully the Dark Knight continues to show positive signs on the mound as he recovers from his surgery.

Noah SynderGod Saves The Day

Final Score: Mets 5, Marlins 2

Quick Hits

  • After two straight mediocre performances by Mets starting pitchers, Noah SynderGod saved the day by throwing 7 innings, giving up 2 runs on 5 hits, and striking out 9 Marlins.
  • ESPN sucks. They did a segment last night where that ginger guy interviewed Mr. Met and he asked him how he felt about Thor cuckolding him and sleeping with his mascot wife Mrs. Met. That’s when I switched the game to iPad and mute. Unwatchable broadcast.
  • Jay Bruce and Michael Conforto both hit solo homers and helped the Mets win. In what feels like an endless conversation about who should start (Bruce vs. Conforto), last night felt like it should have been an eye opener for Terry that both guys can play at the SAME TIME. Based on his in-game and postgame comments it doesn’t sound like Terry got the message.

Marlins’ Mistake Helps Mets Score: In the first inning Asdrubal Cabrera reached on a bunt single and Yoenis Cespedes followed that with a single up the middle that allowed Cabrera to advance to third base. Jay Bruce then hit a ball to first base, Justin Bour threw the ball home, and J.T. Realmuto took his eye off the ball and missed the throw. That allowed Cabrera to score. Neil Walker followed that with an RBI single. Lucas Duda singled to load the bases, and then the Marlins gave the Mets their third run by walking Michael Conforto with the bases loaded.

Mets’ Mistake Helps Marlins Score: Derek Dietrich doubled to start the third inning. Then Miguel Rojas hit a ball to left center field and Yoenis Cespedes dropped it for an error. That set up second and third and Dee Gordon capitalized with a two run double to make it 3-2. Rene Rivera saved the inning by gunning down two runners trying to steal on Noah Syndergaard.

The Saga Of Bruce And Conforto: As I said above, last night’s narrative surrounding Jay Bruce (solo homer in the 5th inning) and Michael Conforto (solo shot in the 6th inning) should have been positive. But all I heard from Terry was him blaming Michael Conforto for the third inning Yo error during an in-game dugout interview. Then when asked if Conforto would play tomorrow he said no and wondered aloud where he would play Conforto.

Ummm hey Terry you moron, he can play at the same time as Jay Bruce. You literally just did it. Grandy hasn’t looked great at the plate or in center field. It’s called rotating the players man. You think Yo’s playing 162? You think Jay “DH” Bruce’s knees are going to last in the outfield all season? You think Grandy can handle center field more than a few days a week? The guy’s already misjudging fly balls and looking drained out there. Rotate the outfielders and find playing time for Conforto! Do it. Sandy better tell him to do it. I’ve had enough of Terry’s anti-Conforto BS. There is plenty of playing time to go around. Jeeeesus.

Today: The Phillies have been the NL East team that the Mets have consistently handled in recent years. So maybe a trip to Philly will spark the first winning streak of the season for the Mets. Jacob deGrom vs. Jerad Eickhoff in tonight’s game. Ace number two gets a chance to keep Thor’s momentum going.

Mets Play Another Stinker 

Final Score: Marlins 8, Mets 1

To summarize this crappy loss, the Mets offense was non-existent (again), the bullpen looked like crap (again), the defense was horrendous (again) and the starting pitching was thoroughly disappointing. It was a total stinker in every single way.

No Offense: The pathetic Mets lineup managed to get three hits. The first hit was a Lucas Duda solo homer in the bottom of the 5th inning. That homer represented the only run. The rest of the game was filled with Mets striking out (13 times). Over the first five innings the Mets made Adam Conley look like Tom Glavine in his prime. Then the Marlins pen combined to pitch four innings, giving up two hits and striking out sevem. Yoenis Cespedes and Wilmer Flores both went 0 for 3 and struck out twice. Neil Walker struck out four times. Jose Reyes didn’t start this game, but even he managed to sneak in a quick K in his pinch hitting appearance.

Shake Things Up: It’s cold and early in the season. It’s not time to make sweeping judgements about how this offense will perform over the course of the year. But the reality is we already saw this lineup last year, and we know that it’s feast or famine. In the short term, Terry needs to get Michael Conforto into the lineup and possibly T.J. Rivera. Let’s shake things up for a few days.

Rough Start: Robert Gsellman left balls up in the zone and the Marlins hit everything hard. In the first inning Gsellman gave up a one out double to Miguel Rojas and then with two outs Giancarlo Stanton singled to bring the first run home. In the second inning he gave up a moon shot homer to Marcell Ozuna. In the third inning J.T. Realmuto hit a “triple” (see horrendous defense section below) and Miguel Rojas drove him in on a sac fly. Gsellman also ran into major trouble in the 5th inning, but Terry stuck with him and he was able to strike out Marcell Ozuna with runners on second and third and two outs. It may have been a poor start, but it was nice to see him finish strong and keep the team in the game.

Horrendous Defense: In the third inning, J.T. Realmuto hit a ball to center field and Curtis Granderson straight up misplayed it. It should have been an out and instead it was a triple. It’s a reminder that Curtis does not belong in center field at 36 years old. The Grandyman also made an excellent catch in center field to end the 6th inning, but in reality he was just playing too deep and was able to make the catch at the last second. After the diving catch I saw the look on his face and it said “I can’t do this for 162.”

In the 4th inning, Wilmer Flores butchered a ground ball to third base for an error.

The other obvious defensive liability worth noting is Jay Bruce. I feel like he had a ball hit to him in every inning of the game and every time it happened I was holding my breath. He really stinks out there.

Bullpen Rocked: Josh Smoker pitched a strong sixth inning and Jerry Blevins retired a couple of batters but Hansel Robles, Paul Sewald, and Rafael Montero looked tired and awful. Hansel Robles walked two batters in the 7th inning and gave up a run. Once it was 4-1 I felt like Terry was waving the white flag when he brought in newly called up Paul Sewald to pitch the 8th inning. But after Paul gave up two runs, Terry seemingly abandoned the plan and decided to use the same overtaxed relievers yet again. Blevins came in and then he turned to Rafael “Dead Arm” Montero and even Fernando Salas pitched in a freaking blowout. Terry stinks.

Stray Notes

Dead Wrist: Asdrubal Cabrera was flexing his wrist after his first and second at-bat. He stayed in the game, but I’m sure he’ll need a season ending wristectomy.

Schedule BS: The Mets have 32 consecutive games against the NL East to start the season?!? Is MLB serious? Why the hell would they cram all of the divisional games in April and May? The scheduling people suck. Well I guess the entire season is on the line in April. No pressure. 

Today: Hopefully Noah Syndergaard can help us salvage one game at home against the Marlins. Talk about a pathetic start to the season. If Noah’s blister comes into play tonight Panic City will be in flames six games into the season. Also, blister rhymes with Fister. So we should probably sign Doug Fister.

Mets Lose On Trash Giveaway Night At Citi Field

Final Score: Marlins 7, Mets 2

You know it was a rough night when the top 5 Mets highlights were: 1) Rafael Montero pitched 2.2 scoreless innings. 2) Trash swirled all over the outfield. 3) Rene Rivera had two hits. 4) Keith Hernandez said he used to like Lamb Chop’s Play-Along. 5) Zack Wheeler hit 98 MPH on the radar gun in the first inning.

The Marlins smacked the Mets. Zack Wheeler started out strong, but then he reminded everyone that he hasn’t pitched at the major league level in two years giving up 5 runs over 4 innings. Honestly, his crappy performance was of secondary concern because the offense failed to show up again. The Mets scattered nine hits but really couldn’t find a way to get any runs across. The Mets pitching staff also walked six Marlins. You ain’t winning baseball games if you’re walking the ballpark.

Wheeler Rusty: Zack “Rusty” Wheeler pitched a dominant first inning. He hit 98 on the radar gun and struck out two Marlins. After that it all fell apart. In the second inning he left a hanging slider up to Giancarlo Stanton and Stanton just missed a home run due to the wind. But then he walked Justin Bour, Marcell Ozuna singled, and Derek Dietrich tripled scoring two. Then Adeiny Hechavarria grounded out which scored Dietrich from third base. I blinked and it was 3-1. He also gave up a two run homer to Christian Yelich in the third inning. I’m going to blame some combination of the cold weather, rust, and the trash on the field for Wheeler’s poor performance.

Met Killers: SNY kept showing Yelich’s incredible numbers at Citi Field. Why does it feel like every team that visits Citi Field has at least four players that rake against us? Brandon Phillips and Matt Kemp for the Braves and now Met Killer Yelich is in town. The parade of Met Killers never ends.

Pray For Recovery: Hopefully Zack’s arm feels strong after he recovers from this start. It’s understandable that he’ll need to shake off rust as he continues to make starts in 2017. Pray for his continued health. I was excited to see him back on the mound even though he wound up getting smacked around. And ultimately this was just another spring training start for Wheeler. He clearly needs to get a better feel for his secondary pitches and re-establish his command. As a result of all the injuries to the Mets pitching staff, the team basically decided to let Wheeler complete his extended spring training at Citi Field. So there are bound to be some bumps along the way.

Offense Sucks Again: The real problem was that the offense continued to be non-existent in this game. In the first inning Asdrubal Cabrera singled with one out, Wilmer Flores walked with two outs, and then Curtis Granderson hit an opposite field RBI single. But that was the only run the team scored until Yoenis Cespedes hit a home run in the bottom of the 8th inning. Quite frankly, Yo shouldn’t have been playing that late in a blowout game. Terry was snoozing at the managerial wheel.

Grandy and Rene Rivera each had two hits but the Mets couldn’t score any runs against Wei-Yin Chen who pitched 6 innings and gave up 1 run. Chen even added insult to injury with his first career hit against Wheeler.

Chunky Lefties #TeamJosh: I have no idea why, but I love that the Mets have two chunky left-handed relievers named Josh who have had Tommy John surgery, throw hard, and are trying to establish themselves as reliable major league relievers. I always mix them up. Josh Edgin has the ginger beard and Josh Smoker has the crazy eyes. Smoker also likes to curse and talk to himself on the mound.

Smoker Sucked: Anyway Josh Smoker looked like crap in this game. He started the 5th inning and struck out the first hitter. Then Christian Yelich hit a ball to Yo that he misplayed, and it resulted in a single. After that it all fell apart for Smoker. He gave up hits and walks and before long the Marlins added two more runs to make it 7-1. That basically put the game out of reach.

Good News: Rafael Montero and Chunky Josh 2.0 (Edgin) looked nice in garbage time relief.

More Bad News: Jose Reyes went 0-5 and has been awful in a small sample size. World Baseball Classic fatigue? We better hope that it’s WBC fatigue and not something worse (i.e. he’s washed up).

Tomorrow: Robert Gsellman pitches tomorrow night against Adam Conley. The Mets need Gsellman to be a rookie force on the mound. I need him to come through for my fantasy team. No pressure kid.