The Mets Make Me Sad

Final Score: D-Backs 9, Mets 0

The Mets are now a .500 ball club for the first time since April. They were swept at home by the cellar dwelling Arizona Diamondbacks. They never had a chance to score a run in this game. They are playing like a dead team full of guys hoping the season ends tomorrow. But there’s another month and a half of games left. I have tickets for a game at the end of this month, and I don’t even want to go. So many young campers were at the game today. Poor campers. Nobody should have to suffer like the fans did today.

Noah Syndergaard barely pitched 5 innings, and he gave up 3 runs on 8 hits. He hasn’t been the same since they discovered the bone chips in his elbow. Poor Noah. Jon Niese came on in relief of Thor and was crushed. He gave up 6 runs in one inning of relief. He’s terrible and always has been.

The Most Public Of Our Many Humiliations: This D-Backs series may be the most embarrassing public execution of a Mets season in years. Terry ranted for four minutes after the game about how the players need to be passionate. Terry said if the current crew of players don’t start playing inspired ball, he’ll find guys in Vegas who will. Unfortunately for Terry, there’s nobody left to call up in Vegas. They’re already in the Mets starting lineup. Maybe the Mets will fire Terry Collins and name Eric Campbell manager on an interim basis.

Let’s Be The Actual Worst: If the Mets are going to keep crashing and burning in 2016, then I want the team to post the lowest batting average with runners in scoring position in baseball history. Right now we’re number two, but “worst of all-time” just rolls off the tongue better.

We Are The Actual Worst: The D-Backs ran all over the Mets pitching staff again. They stole four bases against us. The Mets are the worst team in the majors at preventing stolen bases. This has been a problem for the Mets all season, and they haven’t been able to fix it. It doesn’t even feel like they’ve tried to fix it.

The Worst Part of It All: The worst part about this Mets dumpster fire is it’s going to make it harder to sell Yo on a return when competitive teams start showing interest. Yoenis Cespedes is probably packing his golf bag and his horse into his rocket car right now. He’s ready to get the hell out of dodge.

Fear The Real Rock Bottom: I’m scared to watch the rest of the games. The Yo DL trip was devastating. This D-Backs series was brutal. But those aren’t really rock bottom. I’m a Mets fan. I know what rock bottom is like, and I know what “Mets rock bottom” is like. We haven’t seen that yet. That usually involves something like a franchise player being diagnosed with a debilitating spinal condition like poor David Wright. Bless his poor neck and spine.

If I was directing “2016 Mets” the movie I’d just copy the ending of “2015 Nationals”. That’s when you trade for Papelbon, watch him choke Cespedes in the dugout on national television and then cut to black.

Tomorrow: The Padres come to town tomorrow. Styx plays a concert on Saturday. Looks like we’ll see a meaningful concert in August instead of meaningful games in September.

Rock Bottom Again? How Low Can We Go?

Final Score: Rockies 2, Mets 1

Rock bottom. Rock bottom. Rock bottom. Rock bottom… Oh I give up. I wanted to count all the times the Mets have hit rock bottom this season, but it’s basically a daily occurrence at this point. This Mets team is absolutely unwatchable. I love the pitching staff, but baseball games aren’t fun if your team can’t get clutch hits or come back to win.

Today’s game felt the most like the July 2015 Padres rain delay blown save because I was at work during both games and had a meltdown both times. I was in a meeting when Familia blew today’s save, and I wanted to get up and punch a hole in the conference room dry wall. Here’s my 3 step plan to fix this team. 1) Clone Yoenis Cespedes, Bartolo Colon, Noah Syndergaard, Jacob deGrom and Jeurys Familia (yes despite the two blown saves). 2) Fire everybody else. 3) Start the 2017 season with team clone (unless the clones can be produced by the trade deadline).

RISP: The Mets lone run came in the second inning on an RBI double by Rene Rivera. We have literally reached the point where the most reliable hitters on our team other than Yoenis Cespedes are Rene Rivera and Alejandro De Aza. Other than that run it was the same garbage offense we’ve seen for months. The team was 1 for 9 with runners in scoring position. Neil Walker doubled in the fourth inning with two outs, and then Asdrubal Cabrera hit a soft infield hit. But James Loney flew out and left them on base. In the fifth Rene Rivera hit a leadoff double and was stranded. In the 6th inning the Mets again had first and second with 2 outs, and Loney left them on base. In the 8th inning Rene Rivera singled, Alejandro De Aza doubled, and Terry pinch hit an injured Cespedes assuming the Rockies would intentionally walk him. And they did. The Rockies would rather face any player in the Mets clubhouse over a one-legged Cespedes. Anyway, Kelly Johnson hit into a force play at home, Curtis Granderson struck out, and Wilmer Flores flew out. Booooooooooo.

Familia Blew It Again: After Addison Reed and Jerry Blevins combined to pitch a scoreless 8th inning, Terry went back to Familia in the 9th. Terry had said yesterday that Jeurys Familia would not be available for today’s game. But the Mets went back to him. Familia convinced him he was feeling great and ready to go. Does that sound familiar? He gave him the old Matt Harvey “put me in Skip” and Terry was convinced in two seconds. Terry sucks. Anyway, he blew the game for the second day in a row. Familia gave up a leadoff single, a walk, and then a bunt single to load the bases. He struck out Tony Wolters, but then Loney made an error on a slow roller. That error led to the tying run and a wild pitch plated the winning run. The Mets had to pull him and put in Hansel Robles.

By The Way: Jacob deGrom was fantastic as usual. He went 7 innings scoreless innings and struck out 6. No decision obviously. He must be praying for free agency. This team has me wishing I could be a fan free agent. Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way.

By The Way 2.0: Neil Walker had three hits for the second day in a row. I guess he’s heating up? Screw him for taking so long.

By The Way 3.0: Rich MacLeod tweeted during the game that Juan Lagares is hitting .163 in 22 games since coming off of the disabled list. Really? Juan Lagares isn’t hitting well with one functioning thumb? That’s a head scratcher. Gotta love Juanny One Thumb!

Nothing But Ash: If the Mets don’t make a big trade by the August 1st deadline, Panic City will be nothing but ash before the summer is over. The “fire everyone” movement is going to get louder and louder if this team doesn’t pick up it’s play. Where the hell is Kevin Long? Huh? Show yourself Long! Why can’t we hit with runners in scoring position you bastard? You get all the credit for Murph’s tweaked swing and Cespedes’ hitting and this and that. Well I want heads! I want blood! I want accountability! I demand a pointless symbolic firing. Someone must pay the price! The Panic City Meltdown clock is ticking. Tick… tick… tick…

Tomorrow: Whatever. Let’s move past today’s disaster and focus on tomorrow. After all, tomorrow is Jose Reyes setback day!


Mets Hit Rock Bottom 2.0

Final Score: Braves 6, Mets 0

Well I thought blowing a lead and dropping 2 out of 3 to the worst team in the National League was rock bottom for our season. Nope. Getting one hit and swept by them at home the next day is rock bottom. This weekend in totality is really rock bottom. I just thought I’d clear that up.

Mets Offense Recap: N/A

Mets Pitching Recap: Jacob deGrom was mediocre today, but he fired a quality start going 6 innings, giving up 5 hits, 3 runs, and striking out 6. On the New York Mets, when you meet the bare minimum criteria of a quality start and give up 3 runs over 6 innings, you lose 100% of the time. Julio Teheran pitched a complete game shutout. Duh.

A Bastard On Father’s Day: Antonio Bastardo gave up 2 runs in his inning of relief in this game. In the inning he hit Mallex Smith with a pitch, and he balked in a run. That moron Bastardo broke Mallex Smith’s thumb. I guess the scouts who said Bastardo was inconsistent and unreliable were right. The Mets thought he’d be a good setup man like Tyler Clippard. Antonio Bastardo is an erratic, horrendous, useless, left-handed version of Tyler Clippard. We probably should have kept Clip. Jim Henderson and Antonio Bastardo officially stink. Now we wait for Addison Reed to turn back into a pumpkin.

Winds Of Change: Terry said after the game that change is coming to the roster. The Mets are a joke right now so this is a no brainer. I’ve been preaching it for weeks. Activate Travis D’Arnaud and call up Brandon Nimmo/Dilson Herrera next week. Change things up immediately. Spoiler Alert: It won’t make a difference. The guys we have in the lineup right now are going to have to make things happen or we are screwed.

This Isn’t Just About Injuries Anymore: Just an FYI, the injury excuse is wearing thin. Kevin Plawecki sucks I’ll admit that. But Curtis Granderson, Neil Walker, Asdrubal Cabrera, Yoenis Cespedes, and Michael Conforto are all Opening Day starters that are supposed to hit. Wilmer Flores and James Loney have contributed at a reasonable level. And it still hasn’t mattered. We can’t score runs. The Mets have big problems right now. The offensive blueprint isn’t working.

Tomorrow: The Mets get the day off tomorrow before the Royals come to town to embarrass them again. Make changes on Monday Sandy. Black Monday. Shake up the roster. We have to do it. Pray.

Mets Hit A New Rock Bottom

Final Score: Braves 4, Mets 3

When your team blows a lead to the worst team in the National League and drops 2 out of 3 at home to them, it’s safe to say your team has reached a new rock bottom. Honestly, the Mets have had so many horrendous games and moments this year, that it’s hard to comprehend how they continue to lower the bar and find new ways to demonstrate their complete and utter incompetence as a ball club. But here we are on this Sunday, and the Mets are 6 games behind the Nationals for the NL East lead. For those of you monitoring the standings at home, the Mets are now further behind the Nationals than the stinking Yankees (5.5 games back) are behind the Orioles in the AL East. The Mets still hold a Wild Card spot, but we are only a few days away from falling out of that spot and living in full blown Panic City mode. It’s safe to say that in June of 2016, the Mets are nowhere near the team they were last September/October. I don’t know what the future holds. But the present state of the team is bad.

Yo Bomb: Yoenis Cespedes hit a solo blast in the third inning to make it 1-0.

Flo Bomb: Wilmer Flores hit a solo blast in the fourth inning to make it 2-0. Did you know the Mets like to score on the long ball?

Lone Doggz: James Loney went 3 for 3 with a walk in this game. Truly a breakout performance on the night of a big dumpster fire game. In the fourth inning with one out, he hit a triple and Rene Rivera hit a sac fly to score him and make it 3-0.

Leave On A High Note: Steven Matz had a nice rebound performance after a couple of mediocre starts. He went 6 innings, gave up 4 hits, 2 runs, and struck out 7. He didn’t run into trouble until the fifth inning when he gave up a leadoff double to Brandon Snyder. Then with two outs he gave up an RBI single to Chase d’Arnaud to make it 3-1. I wonder if Chase is brittle like his brother Travis. The entire d’Arnaud family seemingly has bones made of Saltine crackers. Also Matz picked off Chase to end the inning. Dope. In the 6th inning, Matz gave up a solo blast to Jeff Francoeur to make it 3-2. He finished that inning and Terry yanked him. I was hoping he’d pitch the 7th, but at the time of the hook I figured Terry wanted him to leave on a high note. Nope. Turned out he had elbow tightness. Greeaaaat.

Pen Implosion: Anyway Jim Henderson came in to pitch the 7th inning and instantly gave up a solo blast to Tyler Flowers to make it 3-3. He didn’t even finish the inning. He left with shoulder/biceps tightness. Terry officially killed him before the All-Star break. His ERA is up to 4.26. He stinks.

Pen Implosion 2.0: In the 8th inning, Addison Reed gave up a leadoff double to Ender Inciarte and intentionally walked Freddie Freeman. Jeff Francoeur then lined out, but Inciarte was able to advance to third base on the throw. Then Addison struck out Nick Markakis. But with two outs, the mook threw a wild pitch and after all that Inciarte scored to make it 4-3 Braves. Rene Rivera probably should have blocked the ball. Inciarte took a risk. But if you put pressure on the Mets they crumble. So smart move by Ender.

Teufel The Moron: In the 9th inning, Wilmer Flores reached first base on a straight up error by Erick Aybar at short. The Mets got a huge break from a bad team. But the Mets are worse. Somehow the Mets are worse. James Loney came up, doubled, and moron Tim Teufel sent Wilmer home. He was dead to rights at the plate. Even our coaches suck. Terrible send. You never send Wilmer in that situation ever. Just horrendous. Ty Kelly then flew out, Alejandro De Aza got hit by a pitch (supposedly), and then Curtis Granderson struck out to end the game.

We Leave Men On Base Always: The Mets left two men on base in the first inning, one in the second inning, one in the 7th, one in the 8th inning, and two in the 9th. That’s our favorite thing to do.

Injury Bug: Jim Henderson and Steven Matz hurt their arms on the same night. They both say they are fine. Yeah right.

Double Promotion Time: The Mets need to consider the Dilson Herrera and Brandon Nimmo double promotion ASAP. The last two bullets in our minor league chamber. Michael Conforto isn’t hitting, and we need a spark. The same old thang ain’t working. Time for a change.

Today: Let’s see if we can win one game at home against the worst team in the National League.