2016 Mets: Pre-Season Scapegoat Predictions 

Before the Democrats had Wall Street and Trump had Mexican immigrants, Mets fans had the Wilpons to blame for all the team’s ills. Whenever the Mets were at or near the basement of the NL East over the last 7 years, the fans would ready their fingers for pointing at Jeff and Fred. “They are slashing payroll! They are in debt! They meddled in baseball decisions! We can’t win unless they sell the team!”

As you might expect, the Wilpons heard the criticism and simply joined in on the scapegoating. In fact, you could say they were the trailblazers for all the modern political finger pointing trends by blaming Bernie Madoff and Latin American immigrant General Manager Omar Minaya. It would be nice if Mets fans, the Wilpons, politicians, and society as a whole could all just unite in their scapegoating and find one illegal immigrant Mexican insider trading hedge fund manager to blame for all of the world’s problems, but I fear that day may never come.

Anyway, whenever the losing set in over the last 7 years (usually right before the All-Star break), Mets fans were ready with the stock Wilpon excuses. However, 2016 will be the first season in a long time where the Wilpons won’t be the default scapegoat. In fact, because the Wilpons signed Yoenis Cespedes and let Maverick Sandy make every move he wanted, fans can’t possibly blame them. At least not this year.

That being said, in a season that begins with the highest of expectations, finger pointing is inevitable the second the slightest thing goes wrong. So without further ado, here is the list of Top 5 likeliest goats if things fall apart in 2016:



5) The New Guy –
Whenever things go wrong, the easiest thing to do is to blame the new guy. And when the new guy is replacing a particularly popular player in Daniel Murphy, it makes him an even likelier target. Neil Walker has been one of the most consistently productive offensive 2B in all of baseball over the last 5 seasons. He’s a switch hitter, a better defender than Murphy, and he’s in a contract year. There’s almost no reason to believe he will do anything but thrive in the middle of the Mets lineup and earn himself a nice big payday after the season. That being said, after watching Jason Bay come over to New York as one of the most productive outfielders in the league and inexplicably deteriorate right before our eyes, there’s no guarantee that someone will thrive in the Big Apple just because they excelled in Pittsburgh. Plus look at the guy. I know he’s got a reputation as a hard-nosed player, but he appears to be butter soft. He looks like the kind of guy that reads the Bible in the hotel room on road trips. And not in that Daniel Murphy psycho fundamentalist Christian way but in that “I read it for the wisdom within” kind of way. I’m confident he is going to have a huge season for us. However, he’ll be one of the first fan targets if he has a rough start to the season and the team struggles.



4) Old Man Collins
– The manager is always a top scapegoat target especially when the team has high expectations for the season. Terry “Cotton Hill” Collins has faced a ton of adversity during his tenure managing this team. From the time he was hired in 2011 until August of last season, the team was completely awful. But the team was bad by design during those years. For the first time ever, Terry has the real NYC spotlight on him, and every managerial decision he makes is going to get scrutinized at an extreme level. Just look at Harveygate in Game 5 of the World Series. Even though he’s made a ton of questionable in game decisions during his time as manager, Game 5 may have been the first time he was broadly criticized by all the MLB talking heads. Why? Because it was a big game and people were actually paying attention. Now Terry is going to face that level of scrutiny for 162 games. We’ve seen Terry handle losing when it was expected, but it’ll be interesting to see how he handles a losing streak when Vegas expects us to win.



3) David Wright‘s Titanium Spine
– Last season, David Wright‘s spinal stenosis and all the injuries on the team in general had a major impact on the Mets pre-trade deadline performance. However, the injured players didn’t get blamed as much as the Wilpons did for not allowing Sandy Alderson to build a deep roster. Well now we have a deep roster, and David Wright has started his inevitable transformation into an injury-prone cyborg. With his spine deteriorating by the day and his desperate need for a futuristic titanium replacement growing, he’s in danger of becoming more machine than man. If he once again misses lengthy periods of the season and the team struggles, the fans may finally start complaining a little more about his frailty and gigantic contract. Or maybe all his robot parts will translate into a late career surge in performance and like astronaut Steve Austin he will transform into the inflation adjusted 138 million dollar man that we always hoped he would be.



2) Matt Harvey and his Sexcapades
Matt Harvey is the face of the Mets franchise. He demanded to be the face when he arrived, and he got his wish. He is always on the brink of being blamed for everything under the sun. He tweeted out that picture after his Tommy John surgery where he was flipping everyone off and he was widely criticized. At the end of last season, everyone was ready to crucify him because of the media fabricated story that he wanted to stop pitching once he reached his “innings limit”. Before the playoffs started he missed some BS workout and everyone was freaking out. The point is everything he does is going to be scrutinized. And all those criticisms I mentioned have happened while he’s been at the top of his game. If he experiences just the slightest amount of playoff hangover fatigue and his performance dips, it won’t be long before the media is blaming his appearances on Late Night with Seth Meyers for the team’s “lack of focus”. As long as the team is winning and he is performing at the top of his game, he can turn his limo into a clown car full of models and take them all to see the Rangers at Madison Square Garden. If Harvey and the Mets struggle, he’ll be run out of town faster than you can say “Dark Knight”.



1) Yoenis Cespedes and his Smoking/Bat Flipping/Laziness
– The acquisition of Cespedes, his torrid summer, and the Mets playoff run, happened so fast that fans barely had time to complain about anything let alone about Cespedes. But that didn’t stop a contingent of asshole Mets fans from forming after the World Series who thought the Mets should let Cespedes walk because he misplayed Alcides Escobar‘s lead-off inside the park home run in Kansas City. That’s right. There were fans who turned against the man who carried the team to the playoffs because he had a bad World Series (along with everyone else on the team). Imagine how quickly they will turn on him if he has a down month and the offense can’t get anything going during his slump. I can hear the complaining already. “His bat flipping is cocky” and “He takes lazy routes to the ball” and “He doesn’t run hard to first base” and on and on. Let’s not forget that Cespedes already has a made up reputation for being a clubhouse distraction, so it’s only a matter of time before the media decides to dust off the old lies and re-print them. In fact, he’ll wind up getting scapegoated for a lot of the same reasons Trump scapegoats Mexican immigrants. Basically a bunch of made up racist reasons. Anyway, let’s hope that we win 100 games and his bat flipping becomes an iconic memory of the season rather than a symbol of his “immaturity” like the Mejia save stomp (R.I.P. Jenrry).

After a run to the World Series and a successful offseason, it’s hard to feel anything but positive about our chances coming into the season. That being said, these are the Mets we are talking about. And I know come Opening Day when the Mets are losing to the Royals in Kansas City and my beer is half-empty, I am going to be looking to point my finger at someone. Better to just prepare for the inevitable now.

Luck O’ The Maverick Rescues Mets From Parallel Universe

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Let’s take a moment and see what could have happened if the Mets had slipped into an alternate reality at the 2015 trading deadline:

February is upon us and it’s nearly time for the start of Spring Training. After the lackluster 81-81 finish to the 2015 season, Sandy Alderson is forced to answer many of the same questions he faced last spring. Will the team finally take a step forward? Will the Mets reach the 90 win goal that management has set forth for the second season in a row? Can the Mets finally beat the Nationals who have won the NL East for 3 of the last 4 seasons?

Mets fans are restless and want to know what can be expected from Carlos Gomez in CF. Gomez, who was acquired at the trade deadline for Zack Wheeler and Wilmer Flores, failed to propel the Mets anemic offense over the final two months of the season. After injuries plagued Gomez down the stretch, Mets fans want to know if he will be healthy this year, and if Sandy regrets giving up Zack Wheeler for just one full season of Gomez before he inevitably tests free agency. In addition, Mets fans wonder how Juan Lagares will react to being relegated to the bench in favor of a player with a similar skill-set just one season after signing a 20 million dollar contract.

The signing of 35 year old utility-man Ben Zobrist to play 2B has provided some excitement for the fan base as he represents the Mets first significant free agent acquisition since the 2013 signing of Curtis Granderson. Zobrist, coming off a World Series championship with the Royals, was courted by the Nationals in the off-season and reportedly had interest in returning to his home state of Illinois to play for the Cubs. However, due to Zobrist’s age and the success of Starlin Castro at 2B during their run to the NL pennant, the Cubs were reluctant to get involved in the bidding. Many experts questioned the Mets decision to give a 4 year contract to a 35 year old player with a recent history of knee injuries. However it was clear during their pursuit that the Mets loved Zobrist and were willing overlook the risks associated with the back-end of the contract.

Ruben Tejada will once again enter Spring Training as the favorite to start at SS despite fans clamoring for an acquisition at the position. Sandy Alderson has remained firm on his view that he is not open to an acquisition at SS (e.g. Alexei Ramirez, Asdrubal Cabrera etc) if it does not represent a significant upgrade over the options on the current roster.

After finishing .500 with a 25th ranked offense that consistently failed to score runs, overtaking the Nationals in the NL East will be more challenging than ever. This is especially true considering the Nationals have had an off-season full of high profile acquisitions headlined by former Met Daniel Murphy and Cuban slugger Yoenis Cespedes.

Aside from the Nats, the early favorite in the National League is the Chicago Cubs. The Cubs are fresh off of beating the Nationals in the NL Divisional Series, taking out the Dodgers for the NL pennant, and going on an unexpected run to the World Series before losing to the Kansas City Royals in 6 games. In addition to retaining Dexter Fowler, Starlin Castro and the other core players from their NL Championship team, the Cubs added Jason Heyward, John Lackey and traded Jorge Soler for Corey Kluber of the Cleveland Indians in an effort to bolster their rotation.

The Nationals have added to their already talented roster in the hopes of winning the NL East for the third year in a row. The Cubs are brimming with confidence and feel they are ready to take the final step to win a World Championship. The Mets just hope that in 2016 they can finally take a step forward and show their fans that the franchise is finally trending in the right direction.

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The story above represents a not so far-fetched Parallel Universe that the Mets could easily exist in right now if not for a few key events.

hawking

I’m not a physicist so I won’t pretend to understand the actual feasibility of the existence of this alternate reality. However, I do know that the Mets were a doctor’s blessing away from that Gomez for Wheeler/Flores trade. A trade the Astros made just a few days after the Mets rejected the deal. Now in hindsight, we can all confidently say that the acquisition of Gomez would not have had the impact that the Cespedes deal had on the Mets 2015 season. Hell there’s almost nobody that could have had the impact of Cespedes.

We also know that in November, the Mets were a handshake and signature away from signing Ben Zobrist to play 2B. If the Mets had acquired Gomez instead of Cespedes at the 2015 deadline, its not likely that their off-season strategy would have changed that much. Clearly Mets management loved the versatility that Zobrist would have brought to the roster. And theoretically, if the Cubs had gone on a pennant run instead of the Mets, perhaps the Cubs offseason thinking would have changed. Maybe Starlin Castro has a big performance in the NLCS and the World Series and the Cubs decide to keep him in the fold, creating an opportunity for the Mets to actually finalize a contract with Zobrist.

The only thing separating the Mets from the mediocre parallel universe above and the sweet reality of the Cespedes acquisition, 90 win season, NL East crown, NL pennant, and ultimately World Series appearance is….dumb luck. That’s right. The Mets got a little bit of the Luck O’ the Maverick. Our quack team of doctors, for the first time ever, actually saw something concerning in their medical review and nixed the Gomez deal. Despite the Mets offering more money to the aging Zobrist, he could not resist the urge to return to his home state. Now the Cubs get to deal with the risks associated with giving an expensive contract to an aging player.

Luck is something we have hardly ever had in the history of the franchise (see: Seaver trade, Nolan Ryan trade, Gooden/Strawberry crack addiction, Bonilla signing, Mo Vaughn trade, Duaner Sanchez cab injury, Jason Bay‘s inexplicable deterioration, Ike Davis‘ magic career ending illness, owners being involved in a Ponzi scheme, and most recently David Wright‘s spinal stenosis. Just to name a few). However, it would seem with Sandy the Maverick at the helm, the Mets are finally beginning to see some random luck in this elegant universe that we inhabit. We just have to hope that the luck continues because without it, we may wind up getting sucked into an injury-riddled black hole of a season that takes us to the division cellar. But as Stephen Hawking said, “The past, like the future, is indefinite and exists only as a spectrum of possibilities.” Let’s hope one of those possibilities is a 2016 World Series Championship.